Pirate vs Ninja. Who would win?

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Staff Sergeant
Jul 24, 2005
A pirate and ninja are both fired from a cannon at each other. They are both co-altitude and co-energy. Who will win?


(P.S. The pirate has a large macaw)
Ninja, they look better. Plus, he has a better roll rate, turn rate and superior firepower. Also, he wins in every catergory of speed except dive ... the heavier build of the pirate gives him better dive characteristics ... so in a high altitude engagement the pirate could escape. But he'd never have any hope of defeating the Ninja ... he's just all round better.
The pirate would naturally use the Macaw as a decoy or distraction causing the ninja to lose precious time in selecting his target at which time the cutlass would come into play
Interesting theory. But I think it would take an experienced and battle-hardened pirate to think that one up in a short space of time. And as much as they might try and say they are experienced ... pirates with that skill are very few and far between.

I'd say average Ninja vs. average Pirate ... it's the Ninja everytime. The Pirate would be a more experienced Pirate ... than the Ninja was experienced just to hope for some kind of victory.

This goes to the Ninja ... they wear cooler clothes for a start.

And I haven't even brought in the Mk.XVI Cyber Ninja from MGS ... quite clearly superior to the early and mid-mark Pirates.


And did I mention the Ninja just looks better.

Although I do give the F.21 Pirate credit for the futuristic look:

My money is on the pirate.

1. He's a dirty, cheating bastidge.

2. Anyone who owns a macaw has to be tough

3. He has a pistol or two stuffed into his wasitband ;)

4. Ninjas are basically good at the unseen, silent attack, putting poision in peoples drink and running away when real soliders show up. They aren't used to having a red headed, eye-patched, bearded manic, weilding a sword and dagger, smelling of rum and macaw droppings hurtling through the air at them at low velocity.

P.S. The macaw also has an eyepatch.
Arrrrrr! Does you think 'e's sceerd of the little bugger? Why 'e'll be rippin uf 'is funny little mask n stewffun it whar the sun dunna shine afore 'e's dunn. Remember lads, Pirate Rule No 5 . . . Arrrrr . . . guns beat knives . . . Arrrrrrr!
well I'd like to expand on why the pirate would win climbing the mast would certainly give him the advantage of height he is able to absorb battle damage as witnessed by his lack of one or more limbs now personally i would consider the throwing star equivalent to 303 and the cutlass to 20 mm as for climb rate the pirate has it all over the ninja with the pirates initial climb rate in excess of 50fpm
I'd destroy them both, what with me being such a sexy beast.

Yes, I have the power to destroy two warriors simply using willpower, sitting at my computer, while they are flying over the ocean. ;)

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