SUBJECT: Deployed Personnel Behavioral Abnormalities
TO: Spouses of Desert Shield/Desert Storm Participants
Deployed members returning home from Operation Desert Storm could experience one or several of the following emotional problems due to minor cultural shock. Don't be alarmed. With a little tender loving care your loved one should return to his or her usual self in adequate time. Do not be surprised if your spouse:
Gets up in the middle of the night and urinates in the cat box
Carries his bed outside to sleep if the air conditioner goes off
Starts mumbling to himself if you serve him scrambled eggs, rice or Creole
Searches frantically for his gas mask just to go to the pantry
Steps outside to smoke a cigarette and then field strips it
Goes over to the neighbor's house to take a shower with them
Walks around inside the house after dark with his flashlight on
Freaks out if you drive over 35 miles an hour
Does his laundry with the garden hose and mop bucket
Calls all stores "Abdul's, Aubi's, or Achmed's
Stretches a clothesline over your bed
Puts all his luggage under his bed and lives out of it until he build a dresser out of cardboard
Stops all buses and asks the driver if he is going to tent city
Writes "free" on all envelopes to be mailed
Complains when he can't find a radio station, which plays only oldies, country, and call to prayer five times a day
Asks every morning "How old is that newspaper?"
Yells at you for not dispersing your automobile
Removes the doors off your car
Brings a shovel, sand bags, and a jug of water when you go to the beach
Asks your neighbors if they got any mail