Howdy From Texas

lucanus said:

I will restrain myself from making Squid jokes.....To a point. My MOS
was Grunt 0311 and Bellhop to the Navy...Served aboard the CV-43.
While aboard that old tub - I broke an Ensign's jaw with a M14....And
transferred to the Rock a week later....I always wanted to throw a
real Squid overboard instead of 'Drownin Charley' but our CO said it
would do no good for inter-service relations...My whole family was
Navy....my DAD served on PTs in WWII. So to confirm my place
as black sheep I joined Uncle Sam's Misguided Children....Do Yall
know the difference between the Boy Scouts and the Marines.....?
Names don't bother me much - Cause like I tell Civies...I been called
worse by Better.
The Boy Scouts have Adult Leadership

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OK lucanus, I don't get it? You broke an ensigns jaw (notice I spell it with a small "e") with an M-14 and transferred to the Rock a week later. Why? Oh, I get it, you screwed up the M-14 didn't you?

U fu*kin pukes have absolutely no frickin sense of humor.... Especially u Senior Chief... Ur salty enough to see it, especially with all the Navy coffee ur ass has drank...

Loby, u've known me awhile to figure this sh!t out man....

lesofprimus said:

Loby, u've known me awhile to figure this sh!t out man....

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DOUGRD

OK lucanus, I don't get it? You broke an ensigns jaw (notice I spell it with a small "e") with an M-14 and transferred to the Rock a week later. Why? Oh, I get it, you screwed up the M-14 didn't you?

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Well, no my 14 wasn't even scratched....I should have just shot him like
my GO's said....But I was afraid the riccohet would kill some innocent
down the passageway....Short of it was he was trying to enter a secured
area without authorization and using his butterbar to intimidate this poor
dumb Jarhead....Never have liked rank-happy folkes so I tapped him in
the jaw with a perfectly executed butt-stroke...My CC instructor would
have been proud...Hey, I called the Docs to come get him...Anyway
after the meeting (read this as Commander's Time)
with my CO and the boat Captain, it was decided that I had used proper
restraint and that ensign with 2 blackeyes and his jaw wired shut was
wrong....And then the fun began, everyday for a week the hissing
ensign would play inspection Jarhead and everyday would leave just a little bit
more crankier....I told him I had gone to Sea School to learn how to
pass inspections....Since I could see no end in sight I requested a new
assignment....Camp Hansen needed a grunt...the rest is history.
Later in this tour my unit was assigned to help with the evac of
Saigon, now that was a Chinese fire drill and a half....
Anybody in here a graduate of Culver, Peacock, Kemper...?

Luc.... pity you didn't break the ensign's neck. Golly gee.... how I hated
ensigns. I tossed one out of my radio shack for twistin' a dial on a receiver.
Took me an hour to get my shore to ship broadcast back. The old man
barred him from the radio shack. Good to have you aboard.

Charles

lesofprimus said:

U fu*kin pukes have absolutely no frickin sense of humor.... Especially u Senior Chief... Ur salty enough to see it, especially with all the Navy coffee ur ass has drank...

Loby, u've known me awhile to figure this sh!t out man....

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Now Les what do you think my last post was supposed to be? An Alpha Strike on the neighbor? OK everybody Les lost his "Soap On A Rope" again!

Howdy, luc from a wannabe military-type (any Branch), and wannabe Texas native . . .

Always wondered what my life would've been like had I joined the Air Force/Army/Navy/Marines when I had the chance (25 years ago!). Might be flying an F-15E or -22 by now, or totin' an M-4 somewhere in Baghdad, or dialing-in my Barrett M-82A2 rifle for an anti-terrorist mission somewhere in the third world. Who knows?

Wife still wants to move back to Tejas (Austin); we'll see how that goes . . .

Anyway, glad to have you on-board!

ccheese said:

Luc.... pity you didn't break the ensign's neck. Golly gee.... how I hated
ensigns. I tossed one out of my radio shack for twistin' a dial on a receiver.
Took me an hour to get my shore to ship broadcast back. The old man
barred him from the radio shack. Good to have you aboard.

Charles

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You know Charles, my favorite time in my career was after I went over 20 and I was an E-8. I would screw with the ensigns and JG's every chance I got. I really had fun my last tour. One time we got a brand new JG onboard and he was a little too cocky. So I sort of cornered him one day and asked him if he knew what a Senior Chief Petty Officers job was. He gave me the "deer in the headlights look" and admitted he didn't have a clue.(Like I didn't already know that, right?) So I explained to him that my job as directed by the C.O. (and I mean the C.O. of any unit) was to train junior officers. He didn't believe me (like a SCPO would lie? ) and headed for the C.O.'s office. The skipper chewed his ass for doubting me .

Being a bellhop was really interesting, I got a free cruise 3/4th around
the world and it didn't cost me a cent. Even tho CV-43 didn't have a
casino, pool or gourmet meals, I got to 'kiss Neptune's baby's
belly!' I stood watches on the bridge and had a ringside seat to one
of the greatest shows around....Naval and Marine airdales being shot
over the bow and then 'landing' back, most times.
2 short sea stories...1. One morning the Chief of the boat told
seaman 'Kilroy' to clean out his coffe urn...Well 'Kilroy' scampers off
and in about an hour comes back with the urn all bristol-bright....Wait
for it Sailorboys....The Chief blows a gasket and said it took him '3
CRUISES!' to age it to his taste the way he liked it!....I think everyone on
the bridge was trying not to laff at poor seaman 'Kilroy'. The Chief used to
make java so strong that sugar floated on top and you stayed AWAKE!
2. Just after crossing the Equator on the cruise out yours truly by some
slipup in command was awarded my third stripe meritoruosly
and given a chance to fly with the AirBoss on one of his Quals 8)
So bright and early the next day Sgt Lucanus is sitting on Cat 1
ready to go zoomin in an F4...
Let's just say I ain't been on a roller coaster since that compares...
As we clear the boat 'Mr Wonderful' goes vertical and that big boat
got very small very quick Then the real fun began....'Mr Wonderful'
opens his bag of tricks and proceeds to give me an OJT of aerial
manuvers Time must have gone super sonic cause all to soon
it is time to return....as we level off and prepare to alight....I ask
'Mr Wonderful' "This red lever does what?" When I looked over his
head and saw that itty bitty boat, I had a new respect for anyone
dumb or brave enough to do this everyday The end of my flight
was the EXACT opposite of the beginning. Instead of a jackrabbit
start - it ended with a stop on a dime As we climbed down on to the
flight deck 'Mr Wonderful' complimented moi on being the 1st non-aviator
to not dirty up is bird by ing - I said "I may be a dumb Jarhead,
but I didn't eat morning chow, Sir!"

This one is for SoD Stitch and any Texicans out there: My wife and I
were standing in front of the Alamo and this clown was showing off
for his "Date"...He told her that this wasn't the real Alamo, the real
one was in Bracketville (the one built for John Wayne's Movie)...I did
my friendliest WTF and corrected him, pointing out that the reason
this Alamo was not in the boonies was because San Antone had grown
around it...Mr Clown asks me how I know this and I pointed out that
all Native Texicans know...As my wife and I continue our stroll...Mr
Dumbjohn told his bimbette that I was lying....But I kept my cool and we
have had a laff ever since over the ignorance of some people.


There once was a roundheel named Shore
Who let all the Sailors score
But tried evey means
To avoid Marines
Cause they say she was rotten to the Corps

G'day Luc. Another Aussie saying G'day mate. welcome to the site. You will find the necassary needed in this site.
1 Thick Skin. sometimes goes with thick head.
2 Sense of sublime. Has to be used when dealing with the ridiculous
3 A multiculturalism diversity. We have all types on this website. Nationality optional
4 You will definitely need a sense of humour. Yes HUMOUR SPELLED with a U
5 Interservice bullshitting to each other prime requirement
6 Definitley a requirement rankle and raise the ire of the Political Correct SECT
who on occassion wander onto this site and last about as long as a spit ball in hades
7 Use of profane language and know how to spell it. And get use to asteriks
8 Realize there are Aussies on the website. And we will definitley take the piss out of you when we see fit
9 Realize there are Englishmen and New Zealanders on the website and they too will take the piss out of you when they see fit.
10 All of the above agendas are all bullshit. Enjoy your stay Luc.

One question where is this Texas again. Somewhere in Canada isn't it?
By the way BASTARDRY isn't just found on your birth certificate. Its also on mine as well Luc

Dougrd: I know all about the coffee urn, Chief. I was very fortunate, first
time I went to sea I was a RM2, having converted from AL. My GQ station
was the crypto center (RM-2342 TTY Crypto repair). I use to listen to
the junior officers (i.e. Crypto Board) tell about their tea parties, their
conquests, about daddy's big Buick convertable, or their Chris Craft.
More BS than you found in boot camp. Glad I never had to pull liberty with
that bunch.

Charles

Charles , I've got to be honest, as we all know not all JO's were bad. Matter of fact there was this LT in my first Hawkeye squadron (VAW124) who was a real good egg. One night in Rota, Spain, I impersonated him all night long. I got six of us transportation back to the base at 0230 for a local hotel, hooked up a ride to the pier, both after he had tried and failed, and then I B.S.ed our way to the head of the line on the liberty boat (at 0530) after we had been told the "O"boat was broke down. Even flashed our ID's at the Beach Guard and they didn't notice we were all enlisted except for the LT. (Every time I pulled something off the poor LT. would shake his head and say "I can't believe it , and I'm the real Lt. ------) On the way out to the America some of the guys in the bow got sort of rowdy and the LT. turns to me and says "Well LT. aren't you going to do something, after all you are the senior officer onboard?" (The Boat "O" was an Ensign) So I told them to knock it off and of course someone said "So who the hell are you?" And I told them I was Lt. so-and-so from VAW-124 and they quieted down. The LT. and I were laughing to ourselves when the ensign leans in and thanks me for dealing with the situation. So I said to him "You're welcome ensign, now do you think you can handle it from here?" He says"Yes Sir, I've got it." I replied "Carry on Mr." The LT. and I laughed about that for days afterward.

mkloby said:

Hey dougrd - why did the navy switch to liquid soap in their showers???

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Because "soap-on-a-rope" was getting too expensive.: You know Squids invented that don't you? It was easy to tell the Fags because they carried very short ropes.

DOUGRD said:

Because "soap-on-a-rope" was getting too expensive.: You know Squids invented that don't you? It was easy to tell the Fags because they carried very short ropes.

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Haha - it's because liquid soap takes longer to pick up

lucanus said:

This one is for SoD Stitch and any Texicans out there: My wife and I
were standing in front of the Alamo and this clown was showing off
for his "Date"...He told her that this wasn't the real Alamo, the real
one was in Bracketville (the one built for John Wayne's Movie)...I did
my friendliest WTF and corrected him, pointing out that the reason
this Alamo was not in the boonies was because San Antone had grown
around it...Mr Clown asks me how I know this and I pointed out that
all Native Texicans know...As my wife and I continue our stroll...Mr
Dumbjohn told his bimbette that I was lying....But I kept my cool and we
have had a laff ever since over the ignorance of some people.

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Yeah, kinda weird how it's in the middle of town now . . . all the old pictures you see of it make it look like it's out in the middle of nowhere. Shows you how big San Antone's gotten in the last 100 years.

Another weird piece of history for those of us raised in "the North": my wife and I were walking through the Capitol grounds in Austin and came upon an immense monument to the Civil War. Having been born raised in California, I just assumed it would be a monument to the "winning" side. Wrong! I was intrigued by the fact it was a monument to the Confederacy; having been "sheltered" all my life in California, it never occured to me that there would still be monuments to the Confederacy somewhere. But there it was, a big ole monument to the Confederacy. I guess you would call that "culture shock".

There are monuments to the Confederacy all over the South. I think is a good thing though because the soldiers who fought and died for there cause should be remembered as well.

DerAdlerIstGelandet said:

There are monuments to the Confederacy all over the South. I think is a good thing though because the soldiers who fought and died for there cause should be remembered as well.

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Yes; in the end, they were all just "brothers". There was no "good" or "bad", just a Nation fighting against itself.

mkloby said:

Haha - it's because liquid soap takes longer to pick up

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SoD Stitch said:

Yes; in the end, they were all just "brothers". There was no "good" or "bad", just a Nation fighting against itself.

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And 140 years later we are still arguing about the same topic that ignited the war between the states, States Rights. ALL those young men dead, wounded and maimed for what? Such a horrific waste of lives.

As are all wars me thinks