Hello from Oz (1 Viewer)

Ad: This forum contains affiliate links to products on Amazon and eBay. More information in Terms and rules

Hello. I am very glad to make the acquaintance of another citizen of the fair nation of Australia.

(simple sincere warm and tactful : well there's no actual rule against it:)
 
Jan, matter of perspective. From here at the top, they drive on my right. Even their clocks are messed up
 

Attachments

  • australian-clock_1k9ff_24431.jpg
    australian-clock_1k9ff_24431.jpg
    35.6 KB · Views: 42
Guess it depends on how much you like little girls!!!
 

Attachments

  • age-difference-age-difference-pedophile-little-girl-pzy-demotivational-posters-1295566448.jpg
    age-difference-age-difference-pedophile-little-girl-pzy-demotivational-posters-1295566448.jpg
    54.9 KB · Views: 42
Last edited:
Hello. I am very glad to make the acquaintance of another citizen of the fair nation of Australia.

(simple sincere warm and tactful : well there's no actual rule against it:)

As if! So fair d'inkum cobber, pull up a koala, put Skippy on the barbie, snap open a tube - and she'll be right.
 
Last edited:
A blokes have act willy in here with all the parlava... what yer guzzlin'? a noogin' of sherbert?
Quit clowning jack and touch yer kick or like for the mulga...

All I wanted was a pint of the amber nectar... :)
 
A blokes have act willy in here with all the parlava... what yer guzzlin'? a noogin' of sherbert?
Quit clowning jack and touch yer kick or like for the mulga...

What the f...!? You feelin' alright John? :)

Welcome, new guy.
 
When we emigrated as £10 poms in 1961 to Australia my dad got a record and book about how to speak 'Strine. My post was an extract set in a Aussie pub when an Englishman trys to order a pint :)

The record books were very funny in a non pc way and most of the humour was directed at the stuffy English.
 
my dad got a record and book about how to speak 'Strine.

I had a colleague who had a parent in the Foreign Office with the same thing; very amusing and like you say John, most of what was in these books would be considered unacceptable today. Mind you, I used to live in Australia and I couldn't understand a bleeding word you said earlier! :)
 
Been a while since I've had any contact with the Diggers but Dinkum is work; Cobber is a close friend; Koala is the koala bear or native sloth; Skippy is a silver marine fish; Barbie as Bar-B-Que or grill; Tube is a can of beer
 
Must be a different Australia to the one I know, Mike! :)

Never heard the word 'Dinkum' or 'Cobber' in 6 years in Australia! A koala is a marsupial, not a bear, Skippy was a bad TV programme where a stuffed kangaroo would talk to a kid, who could understand the chick chick chick sounds, like "chick, chick, chick," "What's That Skippy? There's a bloke trapped in a mineshaft and theres a rail car full of explosives that's about to run off the rails and blow a hole in the dam, which'll flood the mine shaft and drown the bloke and wipe out the entire town? Quick, Do something Skippy!"

A man is a bloke and a woman is a sheila or a chick, depending on if you live on the Gold Coast. Aussies never call a can of beer a tube, but a tinnie can either be a can of beer or a small aluminium boat in which you go feeshing. Beer comes in a seex pack, which can either be 6 beers or a feature absent from the Aussie male physique as a result of excessive consumption of seex packs. A slab is 24 cans of beer, which is infinitely better. The most common mode of transport is a ute, short for utility and comes in either Ford or Holden varieties, depending on loyalties over Bathurst weekend. Aussies have strange eating habits, like chico rolls, but I never once had barbequeued shrimp while I was there. For sport, Aussies enjoy footy in winter (which is actually summer), which is either League or Aussie Rules, depending on which side of the NSW/Victoria border you live, or cricket in summer, which they are infamously bad at. Ben Lexcen is a hero, Warwick Capper a wally and no one likes Wally Lewis.

Queenslanders are Mexicans because they keep crossing the NSW border, Adelaide has no night life, you might as well stay home and have a w*nk, Sydneysiders hate Melbournians, Melbournians hate Sydneysiders and everyone thinks Canberra is a s*ithole. The rest of Australia doesn't count.

Here's a lesson in the differences between Kiwi and Aussie, Kiwi: Fush 'n Chups, Aussie Feesh 'n Cheeps, Kiwi: Pun, Aussie: Peen (Pin), Kiwi: Peen, Aussie, Pan (Pen), Kiwi Sux, Aussie: Sex (6), Kiwi: Seex, Aussie Sax (sex), Kiwi: Jandals, Aussie: Thongs (Flip flops), Kiwi: Togs, Aussie: Cossie (swimwear), Kiwi: Sputfire, Aussie: Speetfire, Kiwi: Meeserschmutt, Aussie: Masserschmeet, Kiwi: Haaavaaard, Aussie: Wirraway, Rest of the world: T-6
 
Last edited:
Australia is a fantastic country and the average Aussie is ok provided certain subjects are avoided :)
Everyone should visit the big country.
I'm due back for a school reunion and am looking forward to seeing the lads again.
 
I love Australia; I'm not ashamed to say that; it's a great place and I really enjoyed living there. I'd go back in a heartbeat if I could.
 
I love Australia; I'm not ashamed to say that; it's a great place and I really enjoyed living there. I'd go back in a heartbeat if I could.
Not sure I could live there, maybe the Gold Coast, but that's like a New Zealand city anyway. I spent two weeks there once, and heard more kiwi accents than Aussie!
 
welcome aboard ozfrog. I live on the eastern seaboard in regional NSW. Half a world away really
 

Users who are viewing this thread

Back