Remembering family and Friends

Discussion in 'Stories' started by MP-Willow, Nov 19, 2004.

  1. MP-Willow

    MP-Willow Member

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    Hello all this is somthing that I was working on for a bit and want to improve. So please read and let me know what you think.

    ***
    Remembering!

    I have for the past years listened to the stories of WWII and the men and woman who fought and died. But I could never understand them or the emotions that they held. This did change some when at an air show I was looking at a bomber. This was a B-24 Liberator built to help drive back the Nazi's from Europe as my father would say. As I looked up at the artwork and bomb missions, the name Miss. Meghan painted on the side I herd crying. On my left was a Lady dressed in a blue shirt, shorts and a straw hat. A younger woman in jeans and tee shirt escorted her. With tears on her cheeks she just stood and looked up at the bomber. The younger woman held her close both not speaking. An older man stepped slowly over to her. He reached out and put his hand on hers. As the three sets of eyes moved over each other faces moved and more tears fell. This lady had lost a husband in the war. He flew Liberators and never got to see his child grow up. Now his Granddaughter stands looking up at the large engines and tears fall on her face. This now I can start to put emotion and people to the stories of war and hate. The three stand and embrace. The only common tie this large machine of war, the B-24.


    © Copyright 2004 Willow (UN: mp-willow at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
     
  2. Nonskimmer

    Nonskimmer Active Member

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    That's pretty touching.
    :salute:
     
  3. the lancaster kicks ass

    the lancaster kicks ass Active Member

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  4. MP-Willow

    MP-Willow Member

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    :) thanks all, but what do you think of it? I want to make it better so what can be better? Or if you like it that much do you want it to be longer? :confused:
     
  5. cheddar cheese

    cheddar cheese Active Member

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    Its very good, but im not of a writer so I dont know how you could make it better.
     
  6. Nonskimmer

    Nonskimmer Active Member

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    You're definitley on the right track with this. If anything, maybe you could find a way to make it a bit longer. Just a thought. :fadein:
     
  7. GermansRGeniuses

    GermansRGeniuses Active Member

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    This is what I fixed...

     
  8. MP-Willow

    MP-Willow Member

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    GRG, thanks, I wil try to work over this a little more to see what your changes are like.

    AS for the question of longer, that can be worked and you might see it in the future. Aviation is somthing I like to write about. :)
     
  9. cheddar cheese

    cheddar cheese Active Member

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    Well you are very good at it 8) Keep up the good work!
     
  10. MP-Willow

    MP-Willow Member

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    Thanks I will be working on this soon.
     
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