Let me add to his story with some of my favorites:
I'll love you forever no matter what.
The check is in the mail.
I'm from the government and I'm here to help you.
This will only hurt for a little while
I'm not addicted, I can quit anytime
You're the best I've ever had
I love the gift it's just what I wanted
But, officer, I only had two beers.
...But we can still be good friends.
Come on, we'll just have ONE beer!
Dad, I need to move out of the dorm into an apartment of my own so I can have some peace and quiet when I study.
Don't worry; he's never bitten anyone.
Don't worry; I can go another 40 miles when the gauge is on "Empty."
Don't worry, it's OK -- I'm sterile.
Five pounds is nothing on a person with your height.
Go ahead and tell me. I promise I won't get mad.
Having a great time. Wish you were here.
I am married, but we're getting a divorce.
I did not have sexual relations with that woman
I did just once but I didn't inhale
If it will make you happy, it will make me happy.
If you get pregnant I promise I'll be there for you every step of the way.
We don't need a map, I know EXACTLY how to get there.
Your baby is beautiful.
The river NEVER gets high enough to flood this property.
You made it yourself!! I never would have guessed.