US GOVT SCARED OF SPITFIRE TR9

Discussion in 'Aviation' started by eddie_brunette, Apr 17, 2008.

  1. eddie_brunette

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    BARTOW-Fla. A Supermarine Spitfire TR9 is being denied export permission from the United States due to Government concerns about the export of military technology and the proliferation of WMD’s.

    The Spitfire, MH 367, was restored in Florida but has recently been sold to a New Zealand pilot. It is being held on the docks awaiting approval to be exported.

    Although the basic design of this fighter plane is nearly 75 years old, the USAF still views the aircraft as a major threat. The Rolls Royce Merlin engine that powers the Spitfire means that it is classified as a ‘Warplane, Merlin-engined, Defense’, or WMD. “Obviously we don’t want other countries to have WMD’s,” said a Pentagon official who did not want to be identified because he did not have the appropriate permission to leak top secret military information to the general public. “We want to make sure that WMD’s are only going to be used by rational, peace-loving, intelligent people...er... like our Government.”

    “Our entire Continental Air Defense Strategy is based on intercepting lost Cessna 172 pilots who fly to close to Dick Cheney’s house,” stated Secretary of the Air Force Michael W Wynne, who did not want to be identified because he didn’t know what he was talking about. “Just one of these fighters, in the hands of a civilian pilot, could rip through our defenses in no time flat. That would not look good on my daily report to the boss.”

    There are major concerns about the technology in the Spitfire falling into the wrong hands. With delays in the F-22, F-35, and air tanker programs much of the air force inventory is not much younger that the Spitfire. Jane’s All The Worlds Aircraft 1945 ed. states that the cutting edge technology incorporated into it’s design means that it can still dominate the aerial battlefield. “Let’s just say that when this [potential export] was first discovered, there were a lot of diapers in the Pentagon that needed changing,” said Wynne.

    The major US concern is that this technology will fall into the hands of potential adversaries of the US military. With the recent expansion in Russian and Chinese forces, coupled with nuclear progress in Iran and North Korea, military tensions are already high. A single Spitfire TR9 could be all that is necessary to tip the balance.

    Military Defense Contractors are also concerned about the potential export. “If this technology was available to our allies, it could ruin the domestic armaments industry” stated President and CEO of Lockheed Martin Robert J Stevens, “Just imagine if Britain could build Spitfires…they wouldn’t need to buy the JSF. I wouldn’t be able to buy that fourth super yacht I’ve had my eye on. It would be devastating.”

    Israel could also be a potential market for the Spitfire. If Israel were able to acquire Spitfires surreptitiously it would put the $16 billion worth of free weaponry it gets from the US at risk.

    Asked to comment about exports to nominally neutral countries like New Zealand, Secretary of State Condoleezza Rice replied “New Zealand? Where’s that? Sounds foreign.”

    The Spitfire is capable of some amazing aerial maneuvers. It can fly straight and level, turn corners, and go up and down. With a suitably experienced pilot it can even do low passes, wing-overs, and half-Cubans. “It’s the half-Cubans that concern us the most,” said Dr Emilio T Gonzalez of the INS. “It’s an election year, so Immigration is getting a lot of public attention at the moment.”
     
  2. Konigstiger205

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    You got to be sh*tting me....:rolleyes:
     
  3. A4K

    A4K Well-Known Member

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    Hope they don't find out we've got Kittyhawks and Mustangs already...! :shock: (Not to mention our new top secret aircraft code namd "Tigermoth" !!!)
     
  4. eddie_brunette

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    Anybody heard about the top secret wooden wonder :) :) :) :0
     
  5. Krabat42

    Krabat42 Member

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    They could buy some I-16's from the New Zealanders and let them fly patrol above Dick Cheney's house, just to be sure. :D

    Krabat
     
  6. ScOoTeR1992

    ScOoTeR1992 Member

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    oh come on that is pathetic anyway the ending of it is FAKE
     
  7. A4K

    A4K Well-Known Member

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    I can't believe you revealed the Wooden Wonder, Eddie !! :shock: I haven't even finished fixing the rubber band motor yet..!!!! :D
     
  8. Konigstiger205

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    My God do you realize what could happen if the Russians get their hand on an Me262...they would just wipe the F22 out of the sky :lol:
     
  9. evangilder

    evangilder "Shooter"
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    Looks like it came straight from the Onion. And guys, when you post a news article, please put a link to where it came from so that proper credit can be given to the author? Thanks
     
  10. comiso90

    comiso90 Active Member

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    There are people that believe this???
    did u even read it?

    "Just imagine if Britain could build Spitfires…they wouldn’t need to buy the JSF. I wouldn’t be able to buy that fourth super yacht I’ve had my eye on. It would be devastating.”

    :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
     
  11. kool kitty89

    kool kitty89 Well-Known Member

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    Funny story though. :lol:


    I think this part is true
    It's just stupid bureaucratic red tape.

    Of course, the whole thing could be fake, but I think that part's true, it wouldn't surprise me at least.
     
  12. DerAdlerIstGelandet

    DerAdlerIstGelandet Der Crew Chief
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    Eddie, you do realize that this a joke right?
     
  13. pbfoot

    pbfoot Active Member

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    Maybe its a joke but getting the old warbirds over the border can be tiresome , if you happen to talk to one that is lacking knowledge about aircraft its humourous , questions about armament, purpose of the aircraft
    So its a bomber?
    yes but no longer
    does it have weapons ?
    no but there are replicas
    What type of Replicas ?

    and on and on and on
     
  14. DerAdlerIstGelandet

    DerAdlerIstGelandet Der Crew Chief
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    I can certainly believe it is a pain in the ass to get import and export them, and yes this story is very funny. It is just bad because so many people will believe this particular story.
     
  15. Flyboy2

    Flyboy2 Member

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    I was believing it for the first part. Man I feel really stupid.
     
  16. kool kitty89

    kool kitty89 Well-Known Member

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    Is the first part true or is the whole thing a joke?

    Still funny though. :lol:
     
  17. eddie_brunette

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    The first time I saw it, I also thought it was true, me sucker, but still funny.
     
  18. A4K

    A4K Well-Known Member

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    The part Kool Kitty highlighted sounded to me like it's based on truth, or atleast a very late April fools day trick. The rest of course is just a joke. (funny though! :) )
     
  19. Konigstiger205

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    Funny anyway...I had my doubts but for a second I really believed it :lol:
     
  20. Catch22

    Catch22 Well-Known Member

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    When I read the Half-Cuban part, I knew for sure it was fake. Funny nonetheless!
     
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