Quotes and Jokes (36 Viewers)

[fubar57]

 

[Gnomey]

 

[Frog]

A man enters a Soviet store and is greeted by an employee and a completely empty and wide space:
- What is this store? You don't even have shelves here!
- It's the shelf store.

 

[Frog]

Finally, it will be a cremation :

 

[GTX]

 

[Greg Boeser]

View attachment 892201

How do you expect to get a job looking like that, kid?

 

[Wurger]

 

[GTX]

 

[Lucky13]

 

[Wurger]

 

[GTX]

 

[GTX]

 

[Gnomey]

 

[SaparotRob]

View attachment 892308

If roosters crow, do crows ever rooster?

 

[A4K]

If roosters crow, do crows ever rooster?

That reminds me of some old jokes we said in primary school:

What's tge difference between a cloud and a boy dropping a weight on his foot?
-One pours with rain, and the other roars with pain.

What's the difference between fish and goats?
-Fish muck around in fountains, and goats...

 

[Lucky13]

The Rings of Power is getting slaughtered online and I have to agree with what they're saying....wtf is this?

 

[Wurger]

 

[Frog]

An old man in USSR waits in line for hours to buy meat, only to discover that there is no more. He throws a fit of rage, yelling how horrible and stupid the regime is.

A KGB agent approaches him and tells him to calm down, adding "don't forget what happened to people like you at the time" and simulates a "pistol shot" gesture with his hand.

The old man returns to his apartment, empty-handed. His wife says: "They have no more meat?"

He replies: "It's worse than you think: they don't even have any more cartridges."

 

[Wurger]

A psychiatrist asks a patient ... why do you think someone is living in your fridge?
Because my wife takes food in there ... the guy replies.

 

[GTX]