You can't fix stupid I swear.

Discussion in 'OFF-Topic / Misc.' started by Chief2387, Nov 20, 2015.

  1. Chief2387

    Chief2387 Member

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  2. at6

    at6 Well-Known Member

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    They call it paranoia.
     
  3. GrauGeist

    GrauGeist Well-Known Member

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    I have actually had several instances of idiots either calling the police or confronting me directly over my tripod. Not so much the heavy aluminum one I currently use, but the black carbon-fiber tripod I used to have (which did look a little medieval when it was collapsed), that was destroyed in the wreck.

    Here's a few social-media examples of ignorance fueled by the ministry of fear:

    gun-fear_earplugs.jpg

    gun-fear_assault-bits.jpg


    And my personal favorite:

    gun-fear_Jeep-MG.jpg
     
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  4. mikewint

    mikewint Well-Known Member

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    #4 mikewint, Nov 20, 2015
    Last edited: Nov 20, 2015
    Dave, did my own research and either one of the first two "bullets" can be shot from that assault rifle.

    "Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
    -Albert Einstein

    Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense, who has been with us for many years. No one knows for sure how old he was, since his birth records were long ago lost in bureaucratic red tape. He will be
    remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as:
    - Knowing when to come in out of the rain;
    - Why the early bird gets the worm;
    - Life isn't always fair;
    - and Maybe it was my fault.
    Common Sense lived by simple, sound financial policies (Don't spend more than you can earn,) and reliable strategies (Adults, not children, are in charge.).

    His health began to deteriorate rapidly when well-intentioned, but overbearing, regulations were set in place. Reports of a 6-year-old boy charged with sexual harassment for kissing a classmate; teens suspended from school for using mouthwash after lunch; and a teacher fired for reprimanding an unruly student, only worsened his condition.

    Common Sense lost ground when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children.

    It declined even further when schools were required to get parental consent to administer sun lotion or an aspirin to a student, but could not inform parents when a student became pregnant and wanted to have an abortion..

    Common Sense lost the will to live as the churches became businesses and criminals received better treatment than their victims.

    Common Sense took a beating when you couldn't defend yourself from a burglar in your own home and the burglar could sue you for assault.

    Common Sense finally gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot. She spilled a little in her lap and was promptly awarded a huge settlement.

    Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; by his wife, Discretion; by his daughter, Responsibility; and by his son, Reason.

    He is survived by his 4 stepbrothers:
    I Know My Rights
    I Want It Now
    Someone Else Is To Blame
    I'm A Victim

    Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone
     
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  5. GrauGeist

    GrauGeist Well-Known Member

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    lol...nope. And did you notice the earplug idiot was in Ferguson when he discovered the "rubber bullets"?

    And I am still waiting to see an example of the media's favorite: high capacity "assault clips".

    My first impression, is that you take a stripper from a K98 Mauser or M1 Garand and throw it at someone (thus committing an act of assault) :evil4:
     
  6. Aaron Brooks Wolters

    Aaron Brooks Wolters Well-Known Member

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    You can fix stupid, but they will put you in jail for it.:rolleyes:
     
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  7. mikewint

    mikewint Well-Known Member

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    The pill that cures stupidity
    Probably too late to be of any help to me, a German scientist has invented the world's first anti-stupidity pill.
    So far, the pill has been tested only on mice and fruit flies, which seems odd to me considering how many stupid politicians, professional athletes and movie stars there are running around loose. I mean, how smart do fruit flies need to be? They see fruit, they land on it, they eat it, and then, most likely, they poop on it. You do not need a Ph.D. from Harvard to lead a successful life as a fruit fly.
    Same goes with mice. A mouse's life essentially revolves around eating, avoiding being eaten and making new mice. I do not look to mice to explain string theory to me, though maybe in the future I will.
    According to the German newspaper Bild, Hans-Hilger Ropers, director at the Max Planck Institute for Molecular Genetics in Berlin, has tested a pill that eliminates hyperactivity in certain brain nerve cells, thereby stabilizing short-term memory and improving attentiveness.
    "With mice and fruit flies, we were able to eliminate the loss of short-term memory," the scientist said.
    One can only imagine that the mice and fruit flies of the world are rejoicing at this news. What mouse has not asked itself where it put that moldy hunk of cheese only to discover, to its embarrassment, that the cheese was in its mouth the whole time? (I have a similar problem with car keys, only I usually find them in my hand rather than my mouth.)
    Given enough time and grant money, Ropers and his ilk may eventually develop an anti-stupidity pill that's safe for people. (It's rumored that a person accidentally swallowed one of the prototype pills and immediately attempted to gnaw through a cereal box.) The trick then would be getting the right people to take the pills.
    It's been my experience that stupid people usually consider themselves quite brainy and are not shy about rattling off their many brilliant accomplishments. (Went three whole days without catching tie in zipper of pants, only occasionally stick fork in electrical outlet, realized after only two tries that Superman Halloween costume does not enable me to fly, etc., etc.)
    We could ask the government to hand them out, though this seems to me like asking the stupid to cure the stupid.
    Newspapers could distribute them, though there would be problems there, too. First off, we'd have to form several advisory committees, then write an editorial asking readers to submit their opinion via a convenient clip-out form that permits no response longer than 12 words.
    The opinions would then be entered into a computer system manufactured in Italy that crashes every time someone embellishes a conversation with hand gestures. Finally, recommendations would be posted on the paper's Web site, where you can access them for only $4.95, tax not included.
    I think the best solution is to make anti-stupid pills available to everyone, regardless of age, sex, physical unsightliness or preference for waxed vs. unwaxed floss.
    If it results in everyone, "American Idol" viewers included, having an attention span greater than that of a fruit fly, it will be worth it.
     
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  8. Gnomey

    Gnomey World Travelling Doctor
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    People are all stupid until proven otherwise...
     
  9. Lucky13

    Lucky13 Forum Mascot

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    Not even with a bit of chewing gum, wire and tape?

    ...lmao!
     
  10. mikewint

    mikewint Well-Known Member

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    If you don't want to wait for the pill there is a QUICKER way:
     

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  11. bobbysocks

    bobbysocks Well-Known Member

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    mike...reminds me about the joke about the "smart pills" that were really rabbit turds...
     
  12. pbehn

    pbehn Well-Known Member

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    Easy to make jokes but a guy in the UK was shot by a police marksman carrying a furniture leg. Since he went into a bar and drank a beer before heading off he was either the coolest terrorist in history or a guy carrying a chair leg.
     
  13. GrauGeist

    GrauGeist Well-Known Member

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    I'm curious...

    Was that furniture leg a semi-automatic?
     
  14. Njaco

    Njaco The Pop-Tart Whisperer
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    idiot105.jpg
     
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  15. Wayne Little

    Wayne Little Well-Known Member

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    There is a sad fact....the [email protected] breed too...
     
  16. Aaron Brooks Wolters

    Aaron Brooks Wolters Well-Known Member

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    Mike, the cure I was referring to involved a pill....................kinda. Dense, comes in a plethora of calibers and weights, and is served at high velocity with gun powder.:)
     
  17. Aaron Brooks Wolters

    Aaron Brooks Wolters Well-Known Member

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    A friend of mine has another saying Chris.
    "Never argue with idiots, innocent bystanders can't tell the difference between the two of you." ; Randy Stilwell
     
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  18. mikewint

    mikewint Well-Known Member

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    Aaron got it. Generally stupid + gun is self-correcting
     

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  19. at6

    at6 Well-Known Member

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    She's probably some gang banger"s girl friend.
     
  20. GrauGeist

    GrauGeist Well-Known Member

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    Nope...note wedding ring and nice yard.

    Just a typical dumbass...
     
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