# One sentence story



## Desert Fox (Nov 10, 2006)

This seems simple and boring at first, but I've played it before, and it can get very interesting. Basically, one person starts the story with one sentence. The next person to post must post only one sentence which continues from the previous one, and at the end we should have a very interesting story....so, if anyone actually understands what I just wrote, here's the first sentence:

In the dull orange glow of an October afternoon, a lone figure could be seen silohuetted against the horizon.


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## ndicki (Nov 10, 2006)

In the dull orange glow of an October afternoon, a lone figure could be seen silohuetted against the horizon. If you had looked carefully into the glare of the sunset, you could have seen he had his head tucked under his arm.


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## k9kiwi (Nov 10, 2006)

As any good Occifer should when at parade rest. Meanwhile the Sgt..


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## cheddar cheese (Nov 10, 2006)

Started to touch the Officer in inappropriate places


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## Matt308 (Nov 10, 2006)

A flash of anger crossed the face of the Marine while stating "I will have you know my french friend, in the Corps that would not be tolerated."


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## ndicki (Nov 10, 2006)

"Aha," replied the Frenchman, smarmily grinning, "But you were srown out of ze Marine Corpse in great dishonour, were you not?"


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## Matt308 (Nov 10, 2006)

"No, you pastry eating cheesepuff..", the Marine replied, "that's the Medal of Honor".


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## the lancaster kicks ass (Nov 10, 2006)

and the Frenchman replied "what is zis Honour? i 'ave never 'eard of it before"


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## Matt308 (Nov 10, 2006)

Recognizing bad french, the worldly Marine, raises his boot toward the gay frenchmans face, "The honor is all yours."


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## Soundbreaker Welch? (Nov 11, 2006)

But before he could kick the Rascals face, the Frenchman drew his sword and cut the Officers head clean off.


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## Desert Fox (Nov 11, 2006)

A high pitched squeal echoed throughout the landscape, as the Frenchman turned to face the milkmaid, standing very seductively, behind him...


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## ndicki (Nov 11, 2006)

And as she bent over to pick up the poor Officer's head, cut off for the second time that day, the Frenchman snickered to himself and


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## Gnomey (Nov 11, 2006)

decided it was time for a glass of good Bordeaux to go with the


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## Desert Fox (Nov 11, 2006)

vile, odourous cheese festering in his brest pocket.


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## ndicki (Nov 12, 2006)

Pensively, he took off his beret and ran his hand back through his greasy black locks, creating a shower of grayish particles onto his shoulders; "Eef only ma baguette was not so flaccid and limp," he lamented quietly.


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## lesofprimus (Nov 12, 2006)

And then, at that very moment, the Frenchman's head burst apart from the lightningbolt that fell straight from Valhallah...


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## k9kiwi (Nov 12, 2006)

Which always happened when one of the Gods broke wind.

At the Bar the Corporal was drowning his sorrows with..


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## ndicki (Nov 12, 2006)

an enemy prisoner and a large bucket of water. "I'll talk!" the POW gasped as the Corporal


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## lesofprimus (Nov 12, 2006)

pulled a straw from his pocket and said,


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## Matt308 (Nov 12, 2006)

"Care to partake in some Coke? It's the only thing that keeps us Frenchmen from running away."


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## Erich (Nov 12, 2006)

....... and with that he exclaimed ........

" Les cieux I se sont empoisonne's et mon penis juste a tombe' "


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## lesofprimus (Nov 12, 2006)

And the prisioner, with his 89 IQ and his 4th grade education, pulls back his sleeve to reveal heroine track marks...


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## ndicki (Nov 12, 2006)

and a tattoo of a busty, half-naked woman, with "Mother" written beneath. "I'll tell you who I get it from," he gasped.


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## Gnomey (Nov 12, 2006)

before reaching for his needle to get a much needed fix of herion...


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## lesofprimus (Nov 12, 2006)

Unfortunatly, the prisoner, in his drug crazed frenzy, injected Clamato Juice instead of heroine, thereby killing himself in seconds...


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## Matt308 (Nov 13, 2006)

As everyone knows that V-8 is a far superior antioxidant fix.


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## ndicki (Nov 14, 2006)

"Oh dear," thought the Corporal, a young lad from Lancaster on his first tour, "Now where did I leave that sheep?"


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## lesofprimus (Nov 14, 2006)

Then, at that very moment, a 6 foot blonde named Gertie walked up to him and said:


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## Desert Fox (Nov 14, 2006)

"Your sheep is dead, I am sorry...here, have this limp baguette. A strange frenchman gave it to me." She then proceeded to have wild sex with the lad, as most 6 foot blondes like to do.


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## k9kiwi (Nov 15, 2006)

A 6 footed blonde, bugger, sounds like we need fly spray  

Meanwhile Private Parts was...


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## Gnomey (Nov 15, 2006)

running around like a madman for he had lost his...


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## ndicki (Nov 15, 2006)

Willie.

Willie - that is, Private William Trubbel, was at that very moment standing in the middle of the parade square, much to the annoyance of the RSM, who could see him from his office window.

"TRUBBEL, YOU 'ORRIBLE LITTLE MAN!" he roared,"WHAT ARE YOU DOING ON MY SQUARE WAVING YOUR


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## Desert Fox (Nov 17, 2006)

sheep about?" And with that, the RSM turned into a large orange pig, and oinked his disapproval. Private Parts, watching from afar, was shocked and appalled, and whispered to himself...


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## ndicki (Nov 18, 2006)

"I knew that compo mushroom soup didn't taste quite right!"


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## Twitch (Nov 19, 2006)

The rounds found their target and the gray 109 disintegrated into a million pieces


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## Matt308 (Nov 20, 2006)

{not quite getting this are you Twitch}

Yet Private Trubble, remained calm, gathered his sheep and whispered sweet nothings in its ear.


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## cheddar cheese (Nov 20, 2006)

It was at this point that the headlights of a car caught Private Trubble in the act, and revealing him to be....


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## Matt308 (Nov 20, 2006)

none other than Canton Silverpants - Green Peace activist.


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## Gnomey (Nov 20, 2006)

This caused a great consternation amoung all the people...


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## Matt308 (Nov 20, 2006)

For Canton Silverpants was known throughout the sheep community as a sexual predator and, even more sinister, a connoisseur of shaven gerbils.


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## Gnomey (Nov 20, 2006)

as well as a known rapist of lifestock and other creatures that lived in and around...


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## ndicki (Nov 20, 2006)

THAT PLACE. A place so evil, so horrendous, as to be utterly


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## Matt308 (Nov 20, 2006)

...flippant. The hereto yet unknown campus for french limp-wristed barristas, Le Prostate Phoame.


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## Desert Fox (Nov 27, 2006)

Canton Silverpants walked toward the car, a mad glint (that could be mistaken for sexual anticipation) in his eye.


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## Matt308 (Nov 27, 2006)

For no one dared visit Le Prostate Phaome in a car! How gauche This new visitor must be none other than Canton Silverpant's...


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## Desert Fox (Nov 29, 2006)

arch enemy and one time lover Augustus Rectum, the man who once stole Canton's...


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## Matt308 (Nov 30, 2006)

taint. However Augustus Rectum was after something much more emotional. Augustus sought...


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## ndicki (Nov 30, 2006)

to re-introduce himself to the joys of


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## Matt308 (Nov 30, 2006)

the Kama Sutra. But the question arose, how could Augustus...


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## lesofprimus (Nov 30, 2006)

find a partner for the joys of sex when his...


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## ndicki (Dec 1, 2006)

Willie - Private Willie Trubbel - was off chasing


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## Matt308 (Dec 1, 2006)

sheep. It had been months since Agustus had stolen some taint and now for all practical purposes...


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## Gnomey (Dec 1, 2006)

the sheep were all free of...


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## Matt308 (Dec 1, 2006)

moral restraint. Augustus turned with a gleam in his eye...

[Anybody read this from the beginning? It's quite hilarious.]


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## lesofprimus (Dec 2, 2006)

and said "Mr. Lancaster Kicks @ss, I have fallen in love with ur prize ewe Esmirelda, and would like..."


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## Matt308 (Dec 2, 2006)

to offer you 5 shilling. Is your ewe...is she a go'er? Eh? Wink, wink, nod, nod, say no more!


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## Desert Fox (Dec 2, 2006)

Lancaster kicks @ss looked Augustus up and down, with a look of abject horror on his face, sighed in resignation and said, "Alright, but only if I get to watch."


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## Matt308 (Dec 3, 2006)

The ewe was petrified with fear. For she knew that everyone must have a bigger willie than theLancasterKicksAss, and Augustus...


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## Gnomey (Dec 3, 2006)

infact was so worried by lanc watching that...


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## cheddar cheese (Dec 3, 2006)

He couldnt get it up. Improvising quickly, he pulled out a...


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## Matt308 (Dec 4, 2006)

hairless gerbil. How would you fancy this my little ewish friend. But most disturbing was Lanc's reaction...


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## ndicki (Dec 4, 2006)

as his small yet tumescent


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## Matt308 (Dec 4, 2006)

diddle fiddle was obviously still suffering from...


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## Gnomey (Dec 4, 2006)

withdrawl from the luxurious and rather large...


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## Matt308 (Dec 4, 2006)

pantaloons he was wearing. "So what about it, Augustus," said Lanc, "when are you..."


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## cheddar cheese (Dec 5, 2006)

planning to lube up? because Ive only got...


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## Matt308 (Dec 5, 2006)

10 minutes left on my viagra and my...


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## cheddar cheese (Dec 6, 2006)

genital wart cream is due to be applied in..


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## ndicki (Dec 6, 2006)

enormous quantities to my left


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## cheddar cheese (Dec 6, 2006)

wing political party which i am thinking of...


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## Matt308 (Dec 6, 2006)

naked to get me more aroused. Augustus was taken aback by...


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## Gnomey (Dec 6, 2006)

the thought of the whole of said left wing political party getting naked...


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## MacArther (Dec 6, 2006)

So he used a dolphin to....


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## k9kiwi (Dec 7, 2006)

The Great And Noble Extra Tactical Soldiers (GANETS) who laughed so hard they...


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## Gnomey (Dec 7, 2006)

all collapsed in a heap on the floor...


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## Matt308 (Dec 7, 2006)

causing the ewe to bolt from Lanc's hands. "Bollocks", cried Augustus...


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## ndicki (Dec 7, 2006)

in shock as the realized that the "ewe" he'd been fondling had a pair. Huge, dangling great bollocks...


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## Matt308 (Dec 7, 2006)

"Lanc! You swine! You were attempting to give me the slip and at my expense! A pox upon you, you heathen slime." Lanc, never bat an eye...


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## Gnomey (Dec 7, 2006)

for it was a well known fact that he in fact...


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## Matt308 (Dec 7, 2006)

Cheddar Cheese in disguise! "Bwaahaaahaaa. I have fooled everyone into thinking I love Amy Lee, when in fact tis I that actually am a sheep lover!"


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## Gnomey (Dec 7, 2006)

at this revelation Augustus freaked out and ran for the sake of his sanity with lanc and CC calling after him..


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## cheddar cheese (Dec 7, 2006)

The real CC then turned up removed his imposters mask and it actually turned out to be lanc again, a cunning double disguise which left Augustus...


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## Matt308 (Dec 7, 2006)

sick at his stomach. Meanwhile the ewe was running for its heterosexual life towards...


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## cheddar cheese (Dec 7, 2006)

Cornwall. Poor ewe was never seen again...Meanwhile..


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## Matt308 (Dec 7, 2006)

the poor hairless gerbil...


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## cheddar cheese (Dec 7, 2006)

Emerged from the anus of a homeless man singing...


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## Matt308 (Dec 7, 2006)

show tunes. But where did the homeless man with a live animal sexual fetish spring from? Only this person could answer. None other than...


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## cheddar cheese (Dec 7, 2006)

Michael Finnigan. He was at home wondering how the hell his chin hairs got blown in when...


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## Gnomey (Dec 7, 2006)

the investigators rang him up about a weird homeless man with a hamster in his ass...


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## Matt308 (Dec 8, 2006)

"Pardon, monsieur" a white american says in bad fake french accent. It was none other than the famous american comic who has jumped the shark, Steve Martin, attepting an impossibly bad Inspector Clouseu impersonation.


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## ndicki (Dec 8, 2006)

"'Ave you got some insulating tape for wrapping ma 'amstaire een, to stop eet goeeng bang when I...


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## Matt308 (Dec 8, 2006)

do zees?"

"No so don't do that", Finnigan said. "Instead do this."


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## cheddar cheese (Dec 9, 2006)

Finnigan then went to the cabinet in his lounge and pulled out what looked like a massive rubber...


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## Matt308 (Dec 10, 2006)

chicken. Finnigan began to vigorously shake the rubber chicken with murmuring...


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## ndicki (Dec 10, 2006)

"Begorrah, but you Froggies don't begin to know what to do with...


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## Matt308 (Dec 11, 2006)

the culinary capabilities of English cooking and a rubber chicken! Hand me some salt."


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## Twitch (Dec 12, 2006)

Matt poured on the fifties from 100 yards from his Hellcat and the Zeke turned into a seething ball of flame before it disintegrated into a million pieces forcing the F6F pilot to bank sharply away.


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## Matt308 (Dec 12, 2006)

.[Well at least your siggy matches your contributions to this thread, Twitch. There is modern medicine for that you know. ]


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## ndicki (Dec 17, 2006)

At that, Finnegan pulled a stick of dynamite out of his webbing, and stuffed it violently up


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## Matt308 (Dec 17, 2006)

the mouth of the rubber chicken. Shaking a bit of salt...


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## Desert Fox (Dec 21, 2006)

into the eye of the Frenchman, he took great pleasure in hearing the screams of pain from his companion. Quickly, he grabbed the Frenchman's behind, yelling....


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## Matt308 (Dec 21, 2006)

"On Dasher. On Dancer. On Prancer. On Vixen. On Comet, on Cupid. On Donna Dixon!"


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## Desert Fox (Dec 21, 2006)

Santa, realising someone was trying to impersonate him, he grabbed the anti-impersonator spray from his desk, and stormed out of his office. Sana can't stand impersonators.


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## Matt308 (Dec 22, 2006)

Yet Finnagin was unaware of Santa's motives. The Frenchmen was not taken aback with having his arse grabbed and the salt was almost gone. What to do?


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## Desert Fox (Dec 22, 2006)

Finnagin looked ruefully out the window, thinking of ways to demean the seemingly invincible Frenchman. All of a sudden it dawned on him! All he'd need was two buxom Swedish exchange students, some honey and a twister mat. Quickly Finnagin gathered his materials, whilst Santa was dashing through the snow on a one horse open sleigh towards him.


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## Matt308 (Dec 22, 2006)

With a sudden rush, the Frenchman has an epiphany. He knows exactly what to do with the "materials". The Frenchman lectures the beautiful Swedes on proper French hygiene and shaving techniques, explains how the French invented honey, and proceeds to perform an eye test with the twister mat.


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## Desert Fox (Dec 23, 2006)

Finnegan, in a fit of rage, tore the Frenchman limb from limb screaming "Daddy, why did you leave me?!!", whilst the buxom Swedes watch in horror as Santa stormed up to the kitchen.


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## Matt308 (Dec 25, 2006)

..with the sheep tucked under one arm and a look of rage upon his face. The buxom Swedes...


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## Screaming Eagle (Jan 5, 2007)

with a look of unimaginable horror on their faces wondered what he was going to do next...


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## Desert Fox (Jan 14, 2007)

Santa roared, "Who here is trying to impersonate me?! Once I find out I will do one of many horrible and dastardly things to you!" And the whole scene unfolded with a tedious inevitability.


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## Matt308 (Jan 15, 2007)

Santa unbuckled his huge black belt and begin to sharpen...


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## Desert Fox (Jan 15, 2007)

...his wit. Yes, Santa could dispose of any impersonator with his razor shap wit as he was a black belt in the art of sarcasm. This ability of his has been known to...


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## Screaming Eagle (Jan 15, 2007)

make chuck norris run away and pee his pants like a little girl...


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## Matt308 (Jan 15, 2007)

with a bag of Depends. But Santa had a more cunning plan...


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## Thorlifter (Jan 16, 2007)

Just like Dr Evil, The brain from Pinky and the Brain, and Stewie from Family Guy, Santa is planning total world domination by using his.......


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## Matt308 (Jan 16, 2007)

sharp wit to convince the French to surrender to their internal Muslim populace.


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## twoeagles (Jan 16, 2007)

But at the last moment, French truffle hunting pigs, sensing doom at the hands of the Muslim hoard, rallied and...


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## Thorlifter (Jan 16, 2007)

....summoned the Lilliputians to arms. They encircled the Muslims and screamed their battle cry of.....


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## Matt308 (Jan 16, 2007)

"Vive le croissant. Allah Akbar."


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## Thorlifter (Jan 16, 2007)

Baffled, dazed, and smelling like 10 day road kill, the Muslims scattered into the trees.


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## Matt308 (Jan 16, 2007)

Only to realize that this too is where Lanc had hidden with his ewe.


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## Thorlifter (Jan 16, 2007)

HA HA HA HA HA


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## Matt308 (Jan 17, 2007)

...laughed Lanc, "For I have an ewe and a circumcision instrument...and I'm dangerous."

[c'mon thorlifter, get with the program, dude]


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## Desert Fox (Jan 17, 2007)

Unfortunately for Lanc, he wasnt as dangerous as he thought he was, for when he was advanced upon and when he brandished his circumcision instrument, he dropped it down a rather large opening in his pantaloons. He screamed...


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## lesofprimus (Jan 17, 2007)

"By Benny Hills' warted arse, I do believe my ****-a-doodle-do has crowed for the very last time.."


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## Matt308 (Jan 17, 2007)

For Michael Finnigan was wringing his hands, fondling his codpiece and lamenting Mozart's death.


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## Desert Fox (Jan 19, 2007)

"Woe is me," He moaned, as his fingers danced their way across the large foam appendage, "what ever am I to do with this large...."


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## Screaming Eagle (Jan 20, 2007)

"contraption I will never know but I am sure that man over there knows what to do" as he pointed to....


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## lesofprimus (Jan 20, 2007)

his brother, who was catching ping pong balls from this hookers...


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## Desert Fox (Jan 20, 2007)

extraodinarily large, and rather attractive...


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## Screaming Eagle (Jan 20, 2007)

ping pong ball launcher machine 2000 which had a recommended retail price of...


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## lesofprimus (Jan 20, 2007)

20,321 Escudos and a bag of rare, Bohemian....


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## Desert Fox (Jan 20, 2007)

Rhapsodies, a delicacy in many Middle Eastern countries.


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## Screaming Eagle (Jan 20, 2007)

But this particular batch were off so he had to settle for...


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## Matt308 (Jan 20, 2007)

Brian May's Bohemian Rhapsodie which is THE definitive version of this song...


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## lesofprimus (Jan 20, 2007)

As he hummed along to Scaramouch! Scaramouch! will you do the fandango?, he noticed a very large, horny...


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## Desert Fox (Jan 21, 2007)

White Rhino, climbing up a tree dragging all the members of Queen behind it. "What the f...."


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## Gnomey (Jan 21, 2007)

is going on here, this is stgranger than being around a large group of Frenchmen...


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## lesofprimus (Jan 21, 2007)

sniffing elderberrys on a cool autumns eve... "Oiy I say there, is that Rhino giving the horn to Freddy Mercury's...."


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## Matt308 (Jan 21, 2007)

"...mother?" For everyone knows that rhino horn is prized for its qualities of...


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## Screaming Eagle (Jan 21, 2007)

taste, yes even freddy mercury's mother could...


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## Matt308 (Jan 22, 2007)

understand the ancient Asian qualities of a snorted aphrodisiac.


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## Screaming Eagle (Jan 22, 2007)

which is why she used it on...


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## cheddar cheese (Jan 23, 2007)

a....


[Laziest contribution ever  ]


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## ndicki (Jan 23, 2007)

HUGE


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## the lancaster kicks ass (Jan 23, 2007)

painting of her son doing.........

(first ever post in this thread)


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## Screaming Eagle (Jan 23, 2007)

what he did best whilst...


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## Matt308 (Jan 23, 2007)

shagging a ewe.


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## ndicki (Jan 26, 2007)

Meanwhile, however, Freddie Mercury and Tom Robinson meandered hand in hand through the bucolic landscape, stopping now and again to admire the russets and oranges of the leaves on the autumn trees, and stroke one another's moustaches with a gentle crack of the wrist...


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## Matt308 (Jan 26, 2007)

"Fat bottomed girls or bicycle race?", Freddy asked Tom...


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## ndicki (Jan 26, 2007)

"Oooh, Freddie," swooned Tom, colouring, "How could I ever make my mind up?"


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## Matt308 (Jan 26, 2007)

Freddie was beaming, "Don't stop me now! I having such a good time. I'm having a ball."


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## ndicki (Jan 26, 2007)

"Oooh, what, only one? You _are_ naughty!" retorted Tom, coyly.


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## Matt308 (Jan 26, 2007)

Freddy was falling for Tom and he knew it, "Ooh you make me live. Whatever this world can give to me, it's you... you're all I see."


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## ndicki (Jan 26, 2007)

Whereupon Tom pulled himself up to his full height, pushed out his chest, and roared, "WHAT A POOF! What are you doing in my Marine Corps, you queen!"


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## Matt308 (Jan 26, 2007)

"Oh how wrong can you be? Oh to fall in love was my very first mistake", lamented Freddy.


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## ndicki (Jan 26, 2007)

"Oooh, go on then, I was only teasing!" cooed Tom.


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## Matt308 (Jan 26, 2007)

Freddie was encouraged, "This thing called love I just can't handle it. This thing called love I must get round to it. I ain't ready for this crazy little thing called love..."


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## Matt308 (Jan 26, 2007)

.[I guess you have to be a real Freddie Mercury afficionado]


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## ndicki (Jan 27, 2007)

(Speak for yourself, mate! I'd sooner listen to John Edmond than that mincing poof!)

"Can I handle your crazy little thing, then?" sighed Tom.


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## lesofprimus (Jan 27, 2007)

And with that, the gayness in all the world was erased by Gandalf The White, holding aloft his gleaming staff, murmering incantations of Old Westernese, in the tounge of Morgoths wrath...


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## ndicki (Jan 27, 2007)

and Freddie's little thing withered and dropped off in the searing glare of his presence.


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## Matt308 (Jan 27, 2007)

Well so much for life imitating art. Freddie was...


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## ndicki (Jan 27, 2007)

bent over, poring on the ground looking for his little thing when suddenly


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## Matt308 (Jan 27, 2007)

...a great cacophony arose. For the buxom blonde Swedish girls had returned.


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## lesofprimus (Jan 27, 2007)

But something was amiss, for these very buxom blondles all had one thing in common,


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## Matt308 (Jan 27, 2007)

...retainers. These weren't ordinary buxom blonde swede babes. They had orthidonture and new how to use it.


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## GregP (Jan 28, 2007)

Glancing down, the milkmaid replied simply, "Eet is unfortunate certainimont, but it EES limp for all the world to see!"


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## ndicki (Jan 28, 2007)

At that, Freddie's moustache drooped and wilted visibly as the most buxom of the girls opened her bulging corset to allow her pink nippled udders to burst forth.


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## Desert Fox (Jan 28, 2007)

"Ah, thats better" exhaled the buxom blonde in her thick, alluring accent, as three ewes bounded out of her cleavage, baaing indignantly.


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## ndicki (Jan 28, 2007)

Freddie watched amazed as Lanc emerged from between her breasts, his eyes riveted on the backside of the nearest ewe.


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## lesofprimus (Jan 28, 2007)

"Oit, what a luvly bit o crumpet that ewe Matilda is.." Lanc exclaimed, dripping sweat from every pore...


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## Matt308 (Jan 28, 2007)

Freddie was astounded, "Death on two legs. You're tearing me apart."


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## ndicki (Jan 28, 2007)

The ewe rounded on him, goggle-eyed, and


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## Matt308 (Jan 28, 2007)

demanded that Freddie intervene and stop Lanc's eweish advances.


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## ndicki (Jan 28, 2007)

"Oooh, you!" said Freddie, looking fixedly at Lanc. "Ewe?" Asked Lanc, "Where?"


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## Matt308 (Jan 28, 2007)

"No you sheep shagging git! Oooh, you! A saying of mock suprise usually followed by a wide eyed expresson" Freddie exclaimed.


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## ndicki (Jan 29, 2007)

"Oh. Bollocks," said Lanc, with his usual punctilious use of appropriate vocabulary."I thought you meant "ewe", you know."


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## Matt308 (Jan 29, 2007)

At that very same moment the heavens opened up and the low cut shirts of the buxom swedes became as wet as...


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## ndicki (Feb 2, 2007)

Lanc, when he had to play rugger at school.


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## Matt308 (Feb 2, 2007)

But Lanc's eyes never left the ewe. For in the rain, the ewe had shrunk, finally answering George Carlin's question.


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## ndicki (Feb 2, 2007)

(Who on Earth is George Carlin?)


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## Matt308 (Feb 2, 2007)

{comedian - Reference HeWho'sNameMustNotBeSpoken signature}


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## lesofprimus (Feb 2, 2007)

ndicki said:


> (Who on Earth is George Carlin?)







U wanna go with me pal??? I'll kick ur ass all over this message board and make ur childerns' childerns' souls shudder at the mere mention of the word Primus....

That being said, heres George....


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