# French Invasion Of North America? LOL



## 102first_hussars (Jan 14, 2006)

I stumbled upon this and once I read it I could not stop laughing at its sarcasm. 



Mr. President: 

Our agents have been intercepting messages from Paris indicating a plot outlining the invasion of North America. 

It appears that after attaining a foothold in the northeastern part of the continent, (called "Quebec"), France has been able to infiltrate the country of "Canada" (the large country immediately to the north of us). Right under our noses, the French have been installing "puppet" (people under the control of France) Prime Ministers for the last 40 or so years. 

Under the reign of these "Prime Ministers", the country of "Canada" has become "Francanised" (made French-like). They have installed "sleeper agents" (agents pretending to do the job, but waiting for orders from France) into all of the senior positions of the public service, military, and propaganda department (known as the "Canadian Broadcasting Corporation" or "CBC"), by instating an "official Bilingualism" (all applicants must be French) policy. 

The France-controlled "puppet" government, AKA (also known as) the "Liberals" (no, seriously, that’s what they are called!), appear to have the majority of the "Canadian" (people of "Canada") population completely "brainwashed" (under their complete control). Anyone dissenting (refusing to go along with) from the Francanisation are ostracized (made to look like ostriches) and labeled "red neck" (i.e. Texan), "neo-con" (i.e. Republican), "Westerners" (people from the western part of "Canada"), "Neanderthal" (cave man), etc., etc. 

In a final stroke before the invasion, the puppet Prime Minister has announced the new "Governor General" (the "head of state" or "big boss") is to be "Madame Jean", a French dual citizen (holds citizenship from France and Canada) from the propaganda department (CBC). This position is not only the "head of state", but also the "commander in chief" of the Canadian armed forces (like you are of the US military). 

When this new "Governor General" takes power (September 27th , 2005) it is believed she will direct the Canadian military to assault the border, backed by French troops. 

Recommendations: 1- Invade Afghanistan, 
2- Invade Iraq, 
3- Impose sanctions against Cuba 

End of report. 

"Everyone’s been led to believe the invasion of Iraq was for oil", says Tom, also an "Iraq invasion" expert, "but, like I’ve been saying all along, it’s due to the Canadian threat." 




Im gonna add some more to this.

4. All three soldiers comprising (forming) the rest of today's Canadian army, ably assisted by the remaining 300 French soldiers who have actually ever seen an evil gun, commence invading North Dakota from Cartwright, Manitoba, straight down provincial highway 5. They are cleverly disguised as three truck-trailer loads of beef, on the hoof. 
5. After rolling undetected through Hansboro, ND, the stealthy invastion force runs afoul of a sleepy deputy sheriff in Rock Lake, ND, due to inattentiveness. All three big rigs blow right through the village's only stop sign. 
6. Taken "forth with" to the local magistrate, the French force temporarily overpowers the Canadian army, and makes arrangements to surrender. 
7. The new GG, reacting to her French citizenship, then surrenders Quebec and all other nearby lands whose citizens really don't care, anyway, to the evil Bushitler. 
8. The evil Bushitler annexs British Columbia to Alaska, and moves the capitol to Vancouver. He annexes Alberta to Montana, and moves the capitol to Calgary. Not wanting to have to again change the number of stars on the flag, he changes the name of the rest of the territory to Northern Rock Lake, and arranges for Austalia to administer it as an under-developed territory. Australia now has a site for their new penal colony. 
9. All of the incumbent liberal politians remaining in Northern Rock Lake are taken into custody and given the option of going to Gitmo or Haiti. Foolishly, all but the GG choose Haiti. 
10. The following day life on the plains returns to normal


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 14, 2006)

Hussars you are dumb. If you really think that Bush is going to invade Canada you are putz! Really your crap is annoying, please stop.


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## Nonskimmer (Jan 14, 2006)

"Blame Canada, Blame Canada..."


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 14, 2006)

I guess, doesn't some of Hussars rambling here really annoy you NS, you know being that you are Canadian also?


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## Nonskimmer (Jan 14, 2006)

I'm actually somewhat indifferent to a lot of that sort of talk, because I see it on television all the time. It's ingrained in the Canadian psyche to such an extent that so many people actually do believe this sort of thing. There comes a point when you get tired of arguing with people over it and you just want to tune it out.

It comes down to the fact that you can either laugh or cry about it, and I'd just rather laugh. What the hell. 
Besides, I think he was joking.


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 14, 2006)

He may have been joking but it is really hard to tell, because he throws out ignorant stuff like this all the time.


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## lesofprimus (Jan 14, 2006)

> because he throws out ignorant stuff like this all the time.


LMFAO....


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 14, 2006)

I think most people here woudl agree with me. I know you do Les.


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## Maestro (Jan 14, 2006)

You know, I once heard that English-Canadians were made of two types of men : the ones "descending directly" from British/Scottish/Irish colons and the ones who are Americans who crapped in their pants during the American Revolution and fled to Canada to remain the King's minion.

The second group has now evolved and is pissing on the USA, seeing that they missed an opportunity to become completely free.

I think that Hussars is part of the second group...


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 14, 2006)

LOL


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## 102first_hussars (Jan 14, 2006)

Maestro said:


> You know, I once heard that English-Canadians were made of two types of men : the ones "descending directly" from British/Scottish/Irish colons and the ones who are Americans who crapped in their pants during the American Revolution and fled to Canada to remain the King's minion.
> 
> The second group has now evolved and is pissing on the USA, seeing that they missed an opportunity to become completely free.
> 
> I think that Hussars is part of the second group...



Actually Maestro I am in no way a descendant of the U.S. 

My mothers family (The Campbells) are of Pure Scottish descent and my fathers family is made up of Pure French descent, French descent hey you and I could be brothers eh? How big is your nose and how tall are you?



Nonskimmer said:


> I'm actually somewhat indifferent to a lot of that sort of talk, because I see it on television all the time. It's ingrained in the Canadian psyche to such an extent that so many people actually do believe this sort of thing. There comes a point when you get tired of arguing with people over it and you just want to tune it out.
> 
> It comes down to the fact that you can either laugh or cry about it, and I'd just rather laugh. What the hell.
> Besides, I think he was joking.



Yes N.S. you are absolutely right I am joking, and I applaud you for being mature enough to see that, you also know that what I say about you guys leaving the hatch open and crashing helicopters is also just in good fun.


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 14, 2006)

Yes Hussars I figured the top part you were kidding on, however the bottom part where you said you wanted to add stuff, sounds just like the regular crap that we all know you sceriously mean and for that reason, no one can tell with this crap.


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## 102first_hussars (Jan 14, 2006)

The bottom part is also a joke, nowhere does it say anything about Bush invading Canada, its a joke about Canada invading the states, read it over again thoroughly and you will see that I am making fun of myself, Canda and France, please you and everyone else got it in your heads that I am out on a mission to shit on the states, you and everyone else percieve everything I say as "Ignorant" when its not true.

And for the record My opinion about canada invading the states, its not even an opinion I listed it as a possibility, and there were alot of other possibilities posted that were bogus.


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 14, 2006)

Oh really whats this then:



> 8. The evil Bushitler annexs British Columbia to Alaska, and moves the capitol to Vancouver. He annexes Alberta to Montana, and moves the capitol to Calgary. Not wanting to have to again change the number of stars on the flag, he changes the name of the rest of the territory to Northern Rock Lake, and arranges for Austalia to administer it as an under-developed territory. Australia now has a site for their new penal colony.


 
Since when is Alberta and British Columbia a part of the US?


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## 102first_hussars (Jan 14, 2006)

My god do you bleed and bruise just a little when someone says something bad about anything American?

Well guess what? I dont like Bush I think he is an asshole, I think Kerry won, I dont like Bush but that doesnt mean I hate america.


And you are ignorant because you are still fixsated on one topic and didnt bother to acknowledge this.



> And for the record My opinion about canada invading the states, its not even an opinion I listed it as a possibility, and there were alot of other possibilities posted that were bogus.


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## Maestro (Jan 14, 2006)

102first_hussars said:


> Maestro said:
> 
> 
> > You know, I once heard that English-Canadians were made of two types of men : the ones "descending directly" from British/Scottish/Irish colons and the ones who are Americans who crapped in their pants during the American Revolution and fled to Canada to remain the King's minion.
> ...





In fact, most of my ancestors came more or less directly from Denmark. I made some searches on my family names a while back...

My great grand-father was a Danish immigrant who came in clandestinely in a boat. He dived into the ocean when he was close enough to the Nova-Scotian coast. So from there, I can say I'm at least 12.5 % Danish.

Then onto the family names... All of my great grand-parents' names (in the exception of one) were "registered" for the first time in Normandy around the XI or XII century. In that time, Normandy was colonized by Vikings (from Denmark).

The only family name that isn't coming from either Normandy or Denmark is "Caron" which comes from Burgundy (an other region of France).

So I can say that I'm approximately 87.5 % Danish and 12.5 % French.


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## 102first_hussars (Jan 14, 2006)

So were not Bros then?


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## Nonskimmer (Jan 14, 2006)

Maestro said:


> So I can say that I'm approximately 87.5 % Danish and 12.5 % French.


Cool. I'm just 100% this and that. 
No French that I'm aware of.


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## 102first_hussars (Jan 14, 2006)

I dont like to brag about the french part of my blood especially in this proving, I be put to death, Death by pea soup drowning.


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## Nonskimmer (Jan 14, 2006)

I've got a lot of Scottish, English, and German all mixed into this magnificent hodgepodge that is me. 
I think I might have some Swiss in there too, come to think of it. I'll have to check the ol' family tree.


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## 102first_hussars (Jan 14, 2006)

> I've got a lot of Scottish, English, and German all mixed into this magnificent hodgepodge that is me.


 

I think of my heritage as a "Cultural Motif"


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 15, 2006)

102first_hussars said:


> My god do you bleed and bruise just a little when someone says something bad about anything American?
> 
> Well guess what? I dont like Bush I think he is an as*hole, I think Kerry won, I dont like Bush but that doesnt mean I hate america.
> 
> ...



Whats your point. I dont think the US is the holy land nor the greatest thing since bread and butter. I dont like Bush either. I did not vote for the guy. I think you just post dumb things when they are not needed. So lets make a deal here:

You stop posting dumb and ignorant shit and Ill get off your back!


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## Maestro (Jan 15, 2006)

Nonskimmer said:


> I've got a lot of Scottish, English, and German all mixed into this magnificent hodgepodge that is me.
> I think I might have some Swiss in there too, come to think of it. I'll have to check the ol' family tree.



I may have a tool to help you. That's the website I used to get the info on my family names.

 http://www.traceit.com/

Type the family name you want in the box, click search, then (on the following page) click on the "More Info" button next to the sentence "The history of (X) family in (Country name)"

However, the site is not perfect... There may be mistakes. For example, my great grand-father's name (the immigrant one) was designated as coming from Poland. But I had a chat with a (Polish) teacher who told me that there were two roots to the Larsen family. One in Poland, and the other in Denmark. The only difference with those two names was the way to pronounce it.


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## Nonskimmer (Jan 15, 2006)

Say, that's pretty nifty. 
I already know that my family name is German, or rather the Anglicized form of the original German name. My dad and I did a thorough trace of our family history together quite a few years ago. My first German ancestors landed in Lunenburg, Nova Scotia in 1799. The Scottish ones arrived around twentyish years before, I can't remember exactly when offhand.


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## pbfoot (Jan 15, 2006)

Mine ran away from some where in PA Pennsylvania in 1779 and austo-hungary (ukrainian or Poland) in 1885


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 15, 2006)

My family is German and Polish decent, and my Step Mothers family is Seven Mountian Saxon.


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## Nonskimmer (Jan 15, 2006)

Nonskimmer said:


> My first German ancestors landed in Lunenburg, Nova Scotia in 1799.


Correction to this. I should have actually said, "My first German ancestors to arrive in Nova Scotia...", rather than "My first German ancestors...".


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## Nonskimmer (Jan 15, 2006)

Christ almighty! When I input the present-day Anglicized spelling of my surname into that tool that Maestro linked to, it comes up with France! 
Not bloody likely! Fortunately, when I input the original German spelling, it comes up with the proper answer...Germany. 
I've long known for a fact that's where they came from. The spelling was changed about a hundred and sixty years ago or so.


Jesus, that was close! Just about gave me a friggin' heart attack!


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 16, 2006)

I typed in my mothers maiden name and it came up right with Poland. They were part of the Piontek family from Kracow way back when. They left for Germany long times ago and for the last several hundred years they were no longer Polish but it was correct in the liniage.


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## cheddar cheese (Jan 16, 2006)

Whaddaya know, My family either come from Somerset or Austria...

Please be Austria....


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 16, 2006)

Why is that.

My father is from Austria. He has not been there though in forever. I go there atleast a couple of times a year.


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## cheddar cheese (Jan 16, 2006)

Cos its more interesting than Somerset


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## DerAdlerIstGelandet (Jan 16, 2006)

LOL


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## Gnomey (Jan 16, 2006)




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