# Meanwhile downunder...



## Wildcat (Mar 11, 2014)

Snake eats crocodile..
Snake eats croc after epic fight in Qld | News.com.au

Man drinks beer after bitten by snake 
http://www.news.com.au/lifestyle/he...ly-eastern-brown/story-fneuzlbd-1226849922618


----------



## Lucky13 (Mar 11, 2014)

You guys need to get off that island more often!

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## Vic Balshaw (Mar 11, 2014)

Ah……………….just another day down under!


----------



## buffnut453 (Mar 11, 2014)

Down under what? Or who?


----------



## Njaco (Mar 11, 2014)

> “I said to myself, if I’m going to cark it I’m going to have a beer,” he told the newspaper. So I got a Goldie out of the fridge and drank that.”
> He was whisked to hospital for treatment but his ordeal spiralled further when he suffered an allergic reaction to the antivenom.



Are they sure he reacted to the snake bite and not the "Goldie"?


----------



## Gnomey (Mar 11, 2014)

Australian's certainly are a certain breed of people...


----------



## vikingBerserker (Mar 11, 2014)

I guess when you live in a place where even the cute things are trying to kill you, you have to be that way. 


I once read a field guide to dangerous critters in Australia and it was a simple 2 step to ID anything dangerous.

1 - Is the creature living?
2 - Then it will try to kill you.

Reactions: Like Like:
4 | Like List reactions


----------



## Wayne Little (Mar 12, 2014)

C'mon down, the waters fine......crocs, Great Whites, box Jellyfish....on second thought stay on the beach....and have a beer...


----------



## Shinpachi (Mar 12, 2014)

I was misunderstood as a Chinese at a tobacco shop in Sydney.
I said "I'm Japanese". Then, all of a sudden, a Chinese old man jumped out from a room behind the shop owner and said "Japanese! You come from us!".
I said "Yes, you are our ancestor!". I was fearful.

Reactions: Like Like:
2 | Like List reactions


----------



## oldcrowcv63 (Mar 12, 2014)

Shinpachi said:


> I was misunderstood as a Chinese at a tobacco shop in Sydney.
> I said "I'm Japanese". Then, all of a sudden, a Chinese old man jumped out from a room behind the shop owner and said "Japanese! You come from us!".
> I said "Yes, you are our ancestor!". I was fearful.



LMAO


----------



## nuuumannn (Mar 12, 2014)

> Man drinks beer after bitten by snake



That would have been funnier if it was Man bites snake after drinking beer...


----------



## oldcrowcv63 (Mar 12, 2014)

nuuumannn said:


> That would have been funnier if it was Man bites snake after drinking beer...



or in Oz it would as likely be:

Man drinks snake after being bitten by beer.


----------



## Airframes (Mar 12, 2014)

After two beers, it might have been "Man eats snake after it devours croccodile".


----------



## N4521U (Mar 12, 2014)

I wouldn't reach for a four exer............. 
More like a Boag's or an Old!
And if'n he woke everone up, he woulda had to share the beer!

BBQ snake wrapped croc............ hmm


----------



## Wildcat (Mar 14, 2014)

In other snake related news...
Python eats dog tied to kennel - Yahoo!7


----------



## Wayne Little (Mar 15, 2014)

That would scare the [email protected] out of ya...


----------



## Vic Balshaw (Mar 15, 2014)

Wayne Little said:


> C'mon down, the waters fine......crocs, Great Whites, box Jellyfish....on second thought stay on the beach....and have a beer...



If'n it’s a XXXX or a Fosters, I'll take my chance in the ocean thanks!!


----------



## Wildcat (Aug 9, 2014)

More croc news...
http://www.ntnews.com.au/news/north...-surprised-shark/story-fnk0b1zt-1227014566443

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## vikingBerserker (Aug 9, 2014)

Surgery on the snake to remove the chain before they release it?????

Ok. in the South it would just be for dinner!

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## at6 (Aug 9, 2014)

To hell with releasing that nasty a$$ snake back into the wild. I would have slowly killed it for revenge. The only good snake is a dead snake. I lived in the southern U.S. for the first 10 years of my life and we were taught to killem.


----------



## Capt. Vick (Aug 9, 2014)

Didn't a big crochet in Australia recently capture, kill and eat a bull shark?


----------



## GrauGeist (Aug 9, 2014)

Capt. Vick said:


> Didn't a big crochet in Australia recently capture, kill and eat a bull shark?


That's the article he posted...big croc, too: 18 feet long, dang.


----------



## Capt. Vick (Aug 9, 2014)

Oh damn! Sorry guys!


----------



## GrauGeist (Aug 9, 2014)

Capt. Vick said:


> Oh damn! Sorry guys!


No prob, and in answer to your original question, yes...that Bull Shark never had a chance. And it was a pretty good sized shark, too.


----------



## gumbyk (Aug 9, 2014)

Aaand reason # 259 on my list of why I'm glad to not live in Australia!

Reactions: Like Like:
2 | Like List reactions


----------



## Wildcat (Aug 10, 2014)

Come on in, the water's fine...


----------



## GrauGeist (Aug 10, 2014)

Wildcat said:


> Come on in, the water's fine...


Yeah...that would be a big "hell no"...

We used to surf in the proximity of Great Whites, but they weren't interested in us, they were after the sea lions and harbor seals and we rarely ever had any trouble.

But being in the water with a 18 foot croc...no way, aint happing.


----------



## Wayne Little (Aug 10, 2014)

18 foot? that'a little one...


----------



## at6 (Aug 10, 2014)

18 FEET is still one heck of a sight bigger than my pet gator that I had as a child. That was back they sold them on Fisherman's wharf in Monterey. Never did figure what we would have done with if it hadn't become ill and died after 18 months. Even the it was between 18 to twenty two inches long with a mouth full of sharp nasties.


----------



## Gnomey (Aug 10, 2014)

This might be part of the reason I can't quite bring myself to move Down Under, despite the upsides...


----------



## YakFlyer (Aug 13, 2014)

Wildcat said:


> Snake eats crocodile..
> Snake eats croc after epic fight in Qld | News.com.au
> 
> Man drinks beer after bitten by snake
> Rod Sommerville sank a cold beer after bite by deadly eastern brown | News.com.au



That is excellent. That is what we would have done, if in doubt, get a cold one. No poisonous critters here though, apart from David Cunliffe.


----------



## Wildcat (Sep 22, 2014)

...and again 


> Top End man attacked by croc, escaped by wrestling and poking it in the eyes, then drank beer as first aid.
> 
> 
> A MAN who was attacked by a crocodile yesterday managed to escape after he wrestled and poked the beast in the eyes “like a true Territorian”.
> ...


Top End man attacked by croc, escaped by wrestling and poking it in the eyes, then drank beer as first aid | NT News


----------



## Wildcat (Sep 22, 2014)

double post


----------



## Wayne Little (Sep 22, 2014)

So does a double post mean he had 2 beers then Andy...


----------



## Wildcat (Sep 22, 2014)

Well apparently he was half p*ssed when he went in the water in the first place  You'd have to be, right?


----------



## Gnomey (Sep 22, 2014)

Only in Oz...


----------



## Shortround6 (Sep 22, 2014)

There's water in OZ


----------



## Vic Balshaw (Sep 22, 2014)

Shortround6 said:


> There's water in OZ



Were surrounded by it!




...


----------



## Donivanp (Sep 22, 2014)

Spent a little time in Darwin back in 82 83 time frame. The best people I ever met were Aussies. If I had a job I would be down under in half a hart beat.. We were invited to a party and our host said what ever you do, don't mix your labels. The Capt said don't try and keep up with the Aussies. I started on white label, they ran out... Green, they ran out.... Blue, you guessed it ended on Cattlemen s XXXX. I think I did anyway. There there was loud banging and my head hurt really bad. We were in the barracks at Darwin. It had a screen door and as each went out they let it slam. I opened my eyes and could not see anything. Oh the blanket is over my head. "The next SOB that slams that GD door will be dead after I feel better" I says. They all cheered, "Don's not dead" they said. I felt like I should be. It took 8 hours and a beer to feel better.

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## vikingBerserker (Sep 22, 2014)

Blue Label, you were doing it right.


----------



## GrauGeist (Sep 22, 2014)

Of course the land is parched...

There must be water involved in the production of beer. Large consumption of beer means less water for nature.

This is most likely why all the wild things in Australia are angry and will kill you.

Reactions: Like Like:
2 | Like List reactions


----------



## GrauGeist (Sep 22, 2014)

Of course the land is parched...

There must be water involved in the production of beer. Large consumption of beer means less water for nature.

This is most likely while all the wild things in Australia are angry and will kill you.

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## Vic Balshaw (Sep 22, 2014)

GrauGeist said:


> Of course the land is parched...
> 
> There must be water involved in the production of beer. Large consumption of beer means less water for nature.
> 
> _*This is most likely while all the wild things in Australia are angry and will kill you*_.



Na mate, the cockies and diggers will just keep plying you with beer, until you's think yer dead, but fur christ sake stay away from the XXXX, for it'll surly kill ya.

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## Wildcat (Sep 23, 2014)

Whatta ya talking about Vic? There's nothing wrong with XXXX mate, I've even almost converted my South Australian Father in law - and he's a big wino and crowny man.


----------



## Wildcat (Sep 23, 2014)

Shortround6 said:


> There's water in OZ
> 
> View attachment 272602
> 
> ...


Only a little bit, this is our biggest lake, located on the other side of the hills all those people are walking too. Looks nice don't ya think?

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## A4K (Sep 23, 2014)

Love that story Andy!


----------



## Gnomey (Sep 23, 2014)

Looks positively delightful Andy, I'll go for a dip after you though...


----------



## parsifal (Sep 23, 2014)

seems like the nutters have arrived. An 18 yo went nuts with a knife when called in for questioning as a terror suspect. Cops weren't expecting trouble, now we have a dead suspect, and two injured cops....and pollies playing games as always


----------



## vikingBerserker (Sep 23, 2014)

We have idiotic politicians like that over here too, I loose more and more respect for them when they do that crap.


----------



## Wildcat (Oct 9, 2014)

Street fighting, Aussie style..
Boxing kangaroos filmed having it out in suburban street


----------



## N4521U (Oct 9, 2014)

Why injuring or asaulting a police officer is not a felony, or killing one Not a capital crime?

I will never figure that out!!!!

Aussie polies are pu$$ie$

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## at6 (Oct 9, 2014)

N4521U said:


> Why injuring or asaulting a police officer is not a felony, or killing one Not a capital crime?
> 
> I will never figure that out!!!!
> 
> Aussie polies are pu$$ie$


Aussie polies will have to stand in line. American polies are even bigger ones.


----------



## Gnomey (Oct 9, 2014)

Well I suppose its better than drunken louts...


----------



## vikingBerserker (Oct 9, 2014)

I'm not too sure of that some days


----------



## at6 (Oct 9, 2014)

Gnomey said:


> Well I suppose its better than drunken louts...


Oh yeah. That would be Hollywood.


----------



## Wayne Little (Oct 11, 2014)

N4521U said:


> Why injuring or asaulting a police officer is not a felony, or killing one Not a capital crime?
> 
> I will never figure that out!!!!
> 
> Aussie polies are pu$$ie$



I think you could use much better and stronger words Bill...


----------



## N4521U (Oct 11, 2014)

Can't think of any Wayne.


----------



## Wildcat (Oct 11, 2014)

It's all good Bill, that idiot with the knife was served justice the good old fashioned way...


----------



## swampyankee (Oct 12, 2014)

Capt. Vick said:


> Didn't a big crochet in Australia recently capture, kill and eat a bull shark?




Big crochet? Was it a fluffy bull shark?

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## swampyankee (Oct 12, 2014)

GrauGeist said:


> Of course the land is parched...
> 
> There must be water involved in the production of beer. Large consumption of beer means less water for nature.
> 
> This is most likely why all the wild things in Australia are angry and will kill you.



It's that they don't get the beer before it's passed through an Australian.


----------



## Shortround6 (Oct 13, 2014)

swampyankee said:


> Big crochet? Was it a fluffy bull shark?




No, but the 'crochet" did use _the fluffy pillow_ in the attack............




"Nobody expects the Spanish inquisition"


----------



## at6 (Oct 13, 2014)

Shortround6 said:


> No, but the 'crochet" did use _the fluffy pillow_ in the attack............
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Don't forget the "comfy chair".


----------



## at6 (Oct 13, 2014)

Shortround6 said:


> No, but the 'crochet" did use _the fluffy pillow_ in the attack............
> 
> 
> 
> ...


Don't forget the "comfy chair". Some how this got posted twice. "And now for some thing completely different".


----------



## mikewint (Oct 13, 2014)

not even downunder

_View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sAn7baRbhx4_


----------



## Gnomey (Oct 13, 2014)

Never thought I'd see the day when crochet became dangerous...


----------



## at6 (Oct 14, 2014)

Gnomey said:


> Never thought I'd see the day when crochet became dangerous...


 It's the sport of kings.


----------



## Gnomey (Oct 15, 2014)

Still wouldn't want 'he died doing crochet' on my headstone...


----------



## Wayne Little (Oct 16, 2014)

me neither..!


----------



## swampyankee (Oct 26, 2014)

Gnomey said:


> Still wouldn't want 'he died doing crochet' on my headstone...



It's a favorite of manly men. Crochet hooks can be as dangerous as chain saws. Well, not quite, but they are quieter.


----------



## Wildcat (Oct 27, 2014)




----------



## Wildcat (Mar 2, 2016)

In other breaking news....
No Cookies | Gold Coast Bulletin

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## vikingBerserker (Mar 2, 2016)

What the......


----------



## mikewint (Mar 2, 2016)

It is of veritabyll report, and attested of so many that there be nowe of wyse and learned none to gaynsaye it, that ye serpente hys eye hath a magnetick propertie that whosoe falleth into its svasion is drawn forwards in despyte of his wille, and perisheth miserabyll by ye creature hys byte.


----------



## buffnut453 (Mar 2, 2016)

at6 said:


> It's the sport of kings.



And queens!


----------



## mikewint (Mar 2, 2016)

TSK!! We don't use that term anymore....for shame


----------



## bobbysocks (Mar 2, 2016)

mikewint said:


> It is of veritabyll report, and attested of so many that there be nowe of wyse and learned none to gaynsaye it, that ye serpente hys eye hath a magnetick propertie that whosoe falleth into its svasion is drawn forwards in despyte of his wille, and perisheth miserabyll by ye creature hys byte.


 
thats easy for you to say....


----------



## Gnomey (Mar 2, 2016)

As you do...


----------



## at6 (Mar 3, 2016)

buffnut453 said:


> And queens!





mikewint said:


> TSK!! We don't use that term anymore....for shame


OK. Can we still say it's the sport of Fairies?


----------



## Wildcat (Nov 4, 2016)

Here's an interesting news story on some recent ancient finds in Oz.
Elder on toilet break finds rock shelter, rewrites Aboriginal history

Reactions: Winner Winner:
1 | Informative Informative:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## Old Wizard (Nov 4, 2016)




----------



## Gnomey (Nov 4, 2016)

Interesting reading!


----------



## Wayne Little (Nov 6, 2016)




----------



## Wildcat (Mar 20, 2017)

The lengths some men will go to to impress a woman.
http://www.news.com.au/technology/s...n/news-story/012cf457f0631243c7c3cfead4a82765. Idiot!


----------



## Robert Porter (Mar 20, 2017)

Darwinism in action.


----------



## at6 (Mar 20, 2017)

She's a hottie, but not hot enough to die for.


----------



## Robert Porter (Mar 20, 2017)

B'zactly


----------



## stona (Mar 20, 2017)

A clear demonstration of the ability of testosterone in a young man to overcome common sense 
Steve


----------



## Shortround6 (Mar 20, 2017)

stona said:


> A clear demonstration of the ability of testosterone (*and alcohol)* in a young man to overcome common sense
> Steve

Reactions: Agree Agree:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## mikewint (Mar 20, 2017)

Well, before you judge let's remember:
1, He was born and raised and lived in OZ
2. He's a male
3. He was born and raised and lived in OZ
4. He was a TEENAGE male
5. He was born and raised and lived in OZ
6. His testosterone blood levels were 10 times normal
7. He was born and raised and lived in OZ
8. Most of his blood had been diverted to his small head
9. He was born and raised and lived in OZ
10. The male small head does not think very well if at all
11. He was born and raised and lived in OZ
12. She was FEMALE
13. And lastly, He was born and raised and lived in OZ

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Funny Funny:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## buffnut453 (Mar 20, 2017)

Robert Porter said:


> Darwinism in action.



Nah...the plonker survived. If Darwin was right, he'd have been removed from the gene pool.

Reactions: Agree Agree:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## mikewint (Mar 20, 2017)

Of the 413 Darwin Award nominations, 332 were independently verified and confirmed by the Darwin Awards Committee. Of these, 14 were shared by male and female nominees—usually overly adventurous couples in compromising positions—leaving 318 valid cases for statistical testing. Of these 318 cases, 282 Darwin Awards were awarded to males and just 36 awards given to females. There is a marked sex difference in Darwin Award winners. Males thus made up 88.7% of Darwin Award winners, and this sex difference is highly statistically significant.

Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Informative Informative:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## Robert Porter (Mar 20, 2017)

Very true! It is significant that the male reaches his sexual peak in his late teens, this allows time for most of the would be Darwin award winners to weed themselves out of the gene pool prior to passing their genes on.


----------



## Gnomey (Mar 20, 2017)

Crikey Mate!


----------



## Wayne Little (Mar 21, 2017)

Well a simple Aussie response......what a D!ckhead.....


----------



## mikewint (Mar 21, 2017)



Reactions: Funny Funny:
3 | Like List reactions


----------



## Old Wizard (Mar 21, 2017)




----------



## Wayne Little (Mar 22, 2017)

Yeah, learned some suff about that too...


----------



## mikewint (Mar 22, 2017)



Reactions: Funny Funny:
2 | Like List reactions


----------



## Old Wizard (Mar 22, 2017)




----------



## at6 (Mar 23, 2017)

In essence a pack of hill billies?


----------



## Wildcat (Mar 24, 2017)

We call them bogans. YouTube "Housos", I dare you..


----------



## at6 (Mar 24, 2017)

Wildcat said:


> We call them bogans. YouTube "Housos", I dare you..


I didn't watch video images, but I did look those phrases up. Australian for Hillbilly. Found in shacks, outhouses. and trailer parks. Either way, they are nasty creatures to be avoided at all costs.


----------



## mikewint (Mar 24, 2017)

Well, don't know exactly! Your, Housos are positively civilized compared to our home-grown Hillbilly/Rednecks. The two terms are not exactly interchangeable. Rednecks are kinda hillbillys corrupted by civilization. True hillbillys are a rare breed as civilization encroaches on their habitat. Theirs is the simple pioneer life





Now when they come down out of the hills and take on some of the trappings of civilization you have your true REDNECK sort of half hillybilly and half city-dweller. Not one for houses and apartments Rednecks choose the TRAILER and in city fashion convert them into Condos








Now just like your HOUSOS, Rednecks have their own language/dialect which is not easy for outsiders to comprehend. That Housos series needs subtitles!




Lastly the population is small and available partners are limited so family reunions are generally held so that the males in the family can find dates!

Reactions: Funny Funny:
3 | Like List reactions


----------



## Gnomey (Mar 24, 2017)




----------



## Robert Porter (Mar 24, 2017)

I had a friend from England visit, and the subject of the term Redneck came up. We were trying to explain that the term could be used with both a negative and positive connotation. i.e. negative meaning un-educated inbred person from rural and agrarian background. Positive meaning country folk also usually from rural areas but typically educated not so much inbreeding and the kind of person you want at your back in a fight. 

He thought on it for a minute and allowed that England had both kinds as well. He said the negative would be equivalent to the "Village Idiot" and the positive would be a footy fan from any of the major teams.


----------



## mikewint (Mar 24, 2017)



Reactions: Like Like:
1 | Like List reactions


----------



## Wayne Little (Mar 24, 2017)




----------



## at6 (Mar 25, 2017)

In the "family" photo I don't see "Uncle Grand Pa". He must have been with "Aunt Grand Ma". The women are flat chested but the men have jugs.


----------

