My favourite was when Ian Thorpe announced his first retirement from Swimming.. the paper here read "Thorpe tosses in towel".
I think the journo's were just looking to use Ian Thorpe and Tosser in the same sentence, but figured if he's retiring it might have been their last chance!
..Like a headstone I saw in a book once with the epitaph '"In memory of (...) who was drowned in the river of Leith, by a few affectionate friends" ...
"A poll conducted by The Sun concerning the merits of two football goalkeepers (David Seamen ?? Flowers) gave rise to the headline "9 out of 10 women prefer Flower's to Seamen". "