SaparotRob
Unter Gemeine Geschwader Murmeltier XIII
They did seem to be decent caterers. Bill was a bit steep.
Quotes and Jokes (1 Viewer)
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Greg Boeser
1st Lieutenant
But you wouldn't want to accept their invitation to dinner.
MiTasol
Captain
Paraprosdokians are figures of speech in which the latter part of a sentence or phrase is surprising or unexpected and is frequently humorous.
1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you ... but it's still on my list.
3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
5. We never really grow up -- we only learn how to act in public.
6. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.
7. Knowledge, is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
9. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
10. In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of an emergency, notify..." I answered "a doctor."
11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
13. I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
15. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
16. You're never too old to learn something stupid.
17 I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it's getting harder and harder for me to find someone older than me.
1. Where there's a will, I want to be in it.
2. The last thing I want to do is hurt you ... but it's still on my list.
3. Since light travels faster than sound, some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
4. If I agreed with you, we'd both be wrong.
5. We never really grow up -- we only learn how to act in public.
6. War does not determine who is right, only who is left.
7. Knowledge, is knowing a tomato is a fruit. Wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad.
8. To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism. To steal from many is research.
9. I didn't say it was your fault, I said I was blaming you.
10. In filling out an application, where it says, "In case of an emergency, notify..." I answered "a doctor."
11. Women will never be equal to men until they can walk down the street with a bald head and a beer gut, and still think they are sexy.
12. You do not need a parachute to skydive. You only need a parachute to skydive twice.
13. I used to be indecisive, but now I'm not so sure.
14. To be sure of hitting the target, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target.
15. Going to church doesn't make you a Christian, any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
16. You're never too old to learn something stupid.
17 I'm supposed to respect my elders, but it's getting harder and harder for me to find someone older than me.
ThomasP
Chief Master Sergeant
ThomasP
Chief Master Sergeant
MIflyer
Captain
Don't you just hate it when this happens?
You are in a tight spot that is a challenge to get into, behind the instrument panel of an airplane, under the transmission of a car, beneath a kitchen sink. And you realize you need a different size wrench than you brought with you. So you crawl out, go to the big toolbox, find a wrench that looks like it will do the job and then squeeze back into that claustrophobic spot - discovering in the process that on this particular trip for some reason you can't bring your right elbow with you any more.
And then with the wrench you so laboriously fetched mere inches from your face, you see it.
The damn thing is metric.
You are in a tight spot that is a challenge to get into, behind the instrument panel of an airplane, under the transmission of a car, beneath a kitchen sink. And you realize you need a different size wrench than you brought with you. So you crawl out, go to the big toolbox, find a wrench that looks like it will do the job and then squeeze back into that claustrophobic spot - discovering in the process that on this particular trip for some reason you can't bring your right elbow with you any more.
And then with the wrench you so laboriously fetched mere inches from your face, you see it.
The damn thing is metric.
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Greg Boeser
1st Lieutenant
Too many times to count.
MIflyer
Captain
Oh, now HERE is a good idea! They did not call it the Friendly Wolf or the Pleasant Wolf, or the Calm Wolf. It is the DIRE Wolf, as in CONSEQUENCES!
I think that No.1 in Lessons From SF Movies is "Don't thaw out a frozen arctic ANYTHING.
But No. 2 is "Don't try to recreate a ancient predator"!
In 10 years animal shelters will be asking for people to come down and pick out a Dire Wolf to take home because they have too many and they are eating the other rescue animals.
I think that No.1 in Lessons From SF Movies is "Don't thaw out a frozen arctic ANYTHING.
But No. 2 is "Don't try to recreate a ancient predator"!
In 10 years animal shelters will be asking for people to come down and pick out a Dire Wolf to take home because they have too many and they are eating the other rescue animals.
Greg Boeser
1st Lieutenant
This is definitely a "Hold my beer." moment.
Oh. So you've cloned a sheep?
Greg Boeser
1st Lieutenant
In other evolutionary news our cats have figured out how to open doors by swinging on the door knobs.
I need to start locking up my keys in case they decide to steal the car next.
I need to start locking up my keys in case they decide to steal the car next.
MiTasol
Captain
One of our dogs worked out how to open this sort of gate lock about 5 years back by repeatedly bouncing the gate up and down so I quickly had to create a dog proof gate lock that works by lifting the gate wire out of the slot. Guess it is about time I straightened that wire.
MiTasol
Captain
Today's mail from wordsmith.org
A.Word.A.Day
with Anu Garg
Everyone likes going places. One might call it a vacation, another a holiday, and some just call it escaping the inbox. But what if your travel plans were dictated by the _literal_ meaning of the word?Here's what your itinerary would look like, etymologically speaking:
This week we're taking you on a, well, let's call it a jaunt (origin unknown). We'll explore places, far and wide, that have become metaphorsin the English language. Such words are also called toponyms, from Greek topo- (place) + -nym (name).
What are your favorite places to visit, whether down the road or across the globe? Do you have a location that you return to again and again?Why? Tell us via our website or emailus at [email protected]. Include your home base (city, state).
And wherever you go, may your journey be less "trepaliare" and more "trip"!
PRONUNCIATION:
(al-SAY-shuh)
MEANING:
noun
1. A sanctuary.
2. A lawless place.
ETYMOLOGY:
After Alsatia, an area north of River Thames in London, once out of the reach of law. Earliest documented use: 1676.
NOTES:
Once upon a Thames, Alsatia was a holy hideaway: a monastery-turned-sanctuary(Whitefriars) north of the river in London. But what began as a sacredrefuge slowly turned into a safe haven for debtors, criminals, and general ne'er-do-wells.
The name Alsatia is a Latinized nod to Alsace, a border region in France that once had a similarly lawless reputation thanks to the centuries of tug-of-war between France and German states. One might say it was a region that couldn't decide whether to say bonjour or guten tag, so it said neither and punched you in the face.
By the late 1600s, the term Alsatia had morphed into a metaphor for any unruly place where laws were more like suggestions and sanctuary came witha side of shenanigans.
A.Word.A.Day
with Anu Garg
Everyone likes going places. One might call it a vacation, another a holiday, and some just call it escaping the inbox. But what if your travel plans were dictated by the _literal_ meaning of the word?Here's what your itinerary would look like, etymologically speaking:
- journey: A day trip (from French jour: day). About 20 miles max in those days
- travel: Torture (Latin trepaliare: to torture). Because travel in those days wasn't exactly a trip to Disneyland
- holiday: Perhaps a pilgrimage, because holiday is, literally, holy day. Well, you could worship the sun
- pilgrimage: A foreign trip (Latin peregrinus: foreign)
- visit: Go see a place (Latin videre: to see). So if you attend a concert, would that be an audit? (Latin audire: to hear)
- trip: Dancing in the backyard (Old French triper: to hop, skip, leap, dance)
- vacation: Vacate the home? Also, the wallet? (Latin vacare: to be empty)
- tour: Spinning in circles? (Greek tornos: lathe)
This week we're taking you on a, well, let's call it a jaunt (origin unknown). We'll explore places, far and wide, that have become metaphorsin the English language. Such words are also called toponyms, from Greek topo- (place) + -nym (name).
What are your favorite places to visit, whether down the road or across the globe? Do you have a location that you return to again and again?Why? Tell us via our website or emailus at [email protected]. Include your home base (city, state).
And wherever you go, may your journey be less "trepaliare" and more "trip"!
alsatia
PRONUNCIATION:
(al-SAY-shuh)
MEANING:
noun
1. A sanctuary.
2. A lawless place.
ETYMOLOGY:
After Alsatia, an area north of River Thames in London, once out of the reach of law. Earliest documented use: 1676.
NOTES:
Once upon a Thames, Alsatia was a holy hideaway: a monastery-turned-sanctuary(Whitefriars) north of the river in London. But what began as a sacredrefuge slowly turned into a safe haven for debtors, criminals, and general ne'er-do-wells.
The name Alsatia is a Latinized nod to Alsace, a border region in France that once had a similarly lawless reputation thanks to the centuries of tug-of-war between France and German states. One might say it was a region that couldn't decide whether to say bonjour or guten tag, so it said neither and punched you in the face.
By the late 1600s, the term Alsatia had morphed into a metaphor for any unruly place where laws were more like suggestions and sanctuary came witha side of shenanigans.
Greg Boeser
1st Lieutenant
Re: visit - to go see...
Yes. To hear - audire.
Auditorium - a place to hear something.
Audience - those that hear.
Audition - a chance to be heard.
Yes. To hear - audire.
Auditorium - a place to hear something.
Audience - those that hear.
Audition - a chance to be heard.
SaparotRob
Unter Gemeine Geschwader Murmeltier XIII
The bacon is for "sacredrefuge".
Awful, I believe, originally meant awe inspiring. Artificial was originally for an artifice and was positive in meaning.
special ed
1st Lieutenant
- 6,588
- May 13, 2018
special ed
1st Lieutenant
- 6,588
- May 13, 2018
special ed
1st Lieutenant
- 6,588
- May 13, 2018
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