Damn! Can't find my Scrooge mask anywhere! Seems to've gone walkabout. I feel your pain, bro.sssh, don't tell anyone, I'm supposed to hate Christmas.
Every greeting that you have listed is potentially offensive to someone, somewhere. Happy secular winter social event.From my family to yours, I wish you all a Happy Stolen Pagan Holidays! I hope its a good one, and may your celebrations be merry. Be safe everyone.
And to those who have no sense of humor:
Merry Crimbo everyone. Don't get too excited over stolen holidays, our day was the solstice on the 21st (Yule) but they did pinch a lot of the trimmings!