It's awkward for..both of us I guess

Discussion in 'OFF-Topic / Misc.' started by Timothy, Nov 10, 2010.

  1. Timothy

    Timothy Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 10, 2010
    Messages:
    32
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    #1 Timothy, Nov 10, 2010
    Last edited: Nov 10, 2010
    I have a girlfriend who I've been seeing for a few months now. She's Japanese and has been living here for 10 years now. My interest in WWII I've come to discover, bothers her. I was watching the WWII in HD one night and she came and sat down next to me and we were watching and then it showed the End Game episode in Okinawa..that's when she got up and said "I can't watch this." and stormed out of the living room.

    I asked her why does it bother you? It happened so long ago. She says that I don't understand. It was rather awkward..we didn't argue or get into a fight..I turned it off and started to play NCAA Football 11..eventually she came out the bedroom and joined me to play video games lol. It's as if that moment before never happened..I felt uneasy for the rest of the evening. I didn't mean to hurt her feelings I guess it would be awkward to watch something like that with your Japanese girlfriend? :|
     
  2. Crimea_River

    Crimea_River Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2008
    Messages:
    25,126
    Likes Received:
    960
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    Calgary
    Maybe when the time is right you can talk about it. I'm not sure what age she is but I'm guessing in her 20's. That's a generation younger than me but where I'm going with this is that as a child of German parents who came to Canada after the war, there was always a certain guilt that rubbed off on me when I was young, even though both my parents were in their early teens through the war. Maybe she has had a similar upbringing, or maybe a strong sense of heritage and therefore discomfort with the destruction, or quite possibly just simply finding it difficult seeing the horrors of this bloody battle on the screen. I have seen some very disturbing scenes from these documentaries and am not surprised that a young, sensitive lady would find such imagery disturbing as well.
     
  3. Timothy

    Timothy Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 10, 2010
    Messages:
    32
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I'm not trying to sound sexist or anything but she's your typical woman..she's about a year older than me..shes 30. She'll cry when she watches sad movies lol When we watched Gran Torino when it came out she was balling her butt off at the end..But that was an awesome movie though
     
  4. Crimea_River

    Crimea_River Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Nov 16, 2008
    Messages:
    25,126
    Likes Received:
    960
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Location:
    Calgary
    Well then you shouldn't be suprised if she doesn't want to see real carnage on the screen.
     
  5. Timothy

    Timothy Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 10, 2010
    Messages:
    32
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    Yeah I gave her a fair warning saying that's why it says Viewer Discretion Advised. I asked her if she had family that was involved during those times and she wouldnt talk about it..so i'm just going to assume that's why.
     
  6. mikewint

    mikewint Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2010
    Messages:
    5,680
    Likes Received:
    430
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Retired and living on the dole
    Location:
    Lakeview, AR
    Timothy, talking this out is the best way to resolve any issue. it is the unsaid that festers. It took many years before i could watch a war movie, or go to a fireworks display, or go down in the basement in the summertime.
    you might also PM Shinpachi for some insights
     
  7. JohnAnthony

    JohnAnthony Member

    Joined:
    Jul 26, 2010
    Messages:
    340
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    16
    Yeah you're assuming it has something to do with her heritage but it may not - some folks are just squeamish. I'm a Christian and I never intend to see The Passion - not into snuff films.
     
  8. mikewint

    mikewint Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Feb 17, 2010
    Messages:
    5,680
    Likes Received:
    430
    Trophy Points:
    83
    Gender:
    Male
    Occupation:
    Retired and living on the dole
    Location:
    Lakeview, AR
    John, don't mean to change the topic but such graphic films have their place. the sanitized passion plays don't portray the total agony suffered by Jesus, the dying was the least of it
     
  9. timshatz

    timshatz Active Member

    Joined:
    Mar 29, 2006
    Messages:
    4,441
    Likes Received:
    3
    Trophy Points:
    38
    Occupation:
    MGR
    Location:
    Phila, Pa
    I don't know that Timothy is in any way responsible for this at all. He told her it was a brutal show, he told her what it was about, she choose to sit and watch it. While as a boyfriend, he was understanding about her feelings, she's gotta take the responsibility for sitting there. While she didn't exactly storm out of the room, she made it plain she didn't agree with his watching it.

    He is what he is, she is what she is. Might be smart if he tells her, "This interests me and I'm going to keep watching it as I want to know not only what happened but why it happened.". Doubtless there are things she is into that he'd rather not bother with and she knows it when he doesn't hang around.

    I've been around other women who didn't want to watch graffic scenes of violence. On the other hand, there are others who aren't bothered by it at all (my wife and I watched Band of Brothers and she was less bothered by it than I was). It depends on the woman.

    I guess it might be smart to figure out was she bothered by the violence or was she bothered by the violence directed towards Japanese.
     
  10. vikingBerserker

    vikingBerserker Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2009
    Messages:
    24,064
    Likes Received:
    655
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Occupation:
    Korporate Kontrolleur
    Location:
    South Carolina
    Just curious, was the show you were watching involve the Japanese Military? If so perhaps watch movies about the ETO or MTO around her. I could understand how watching a movie about the PTO could be upsetting.
     
  11. Timothy

    Timothy Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 10, 2010
    Messages:
    32
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    I was watching the HBO mini-series The Pacific and I warned her that she may not like it and she said "I heard it was good" and I said "okay but dont say I didnt warn you" and low and behold she watched it with no problems..hard to figure out.
     
  12. JohnAnthony

    JohnAnthony Member

    Joined:
    Jul 26, 2010
    Messages:
    340
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    16


    I wouldn't argue that point, it's just not for me. I don't see it doing anything for my personal spirituality, that's all. I don't begrudge anyone else watching it.
     
  13. Matt308

    Matt308 Glock Perfection
    Staff Member Moderator

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2005
    Messages:
    20,140
    Likes Received:
    54
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Occupation:
    Engineer
    Location:
    Washington State
    Women... :rolleyes:

    There is no logic to the emotional locker.
     
  14. vikingBerserker

    vikingBerserker Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2009
    Messages:
    24,064
    Likes Received:
    655
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Occupation:
    Korporate Kontrolleur
    Location:
    South Carolina
    :lol: You took the words out of my mouth.

    Of course, nobody should ever take advice on women from me. From the feedback I get I'm only good at what not to say or do.
     
  15. tail end charlie

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2010
    Messages:
    615
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    18

    Timothy I suggest you watch a movie with your girlfriend where its the American sevicemen that get blown apart for no good reason apart from the directors need to make a buck.........I cant think of a title off the top of my head because I dont think the movie has been made yet. Or if you have the interest perhaps an entertaining documentary on the Iran Contra affaire would do nicely. I have yet to see any documentary that satisfactorily explains why the west armed Saddam to the teeth then decided he was a bad guy. If ever such a documentary is made sit down with your GF and enjoy.
     
  16. Matt308

    Matt308 Glock Perfection
    Staff Member Moderator

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2005
    Messages:
    20,140
    Likes Received:
    54
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Occupation:
    Engineer
    Location:
    Washington State
    Or just watch Bridges of Madison County and then have great sex. Don't waste your brain matter trying to figure her out. Just nod alot, buy her sparkly things and feed her alcohol.

    Oh.. and practice safe sex.
     

    Attached Files:

  17. vikingBerserker

    vikingBerserker Well-Known Member

    Joined:
    Apr 10, 2009
    Messages:
    24,064
    Likes Received:
    655
    Trophy Points:
    113
    Occupation:
    Korporate Kontrolleur
    Location:
    South Carolina
  18. tail end charlie

    Joined:
    Aug 24, 2010
    Messages:
    615
    Likes Received:
    1
    Trophy Points:
    18
    Timothy

    My wife is Catholic and I am Protestant, strange as it may seem I dont routinely ask my wife (or girlfriend as was) to watch Catholics being murdered tortured and burned at the stake, my wife being a diplomatic sort also doesnt require me to watch Protestants being murdered tortured and burned at the stake.

    Its a long time ago now but it was about 4 years before we actually discussed such things, if you see your GF as Japanese first and your GF second maybe its YOU who has the problem. My wife is an arachnophope I move hell and high water to make sure she doesnt see spiders in the house or on TV why not do the same with your GFs dislikes?
     
  19. Timothy

    Timothy Banned

    Joined:
    Nov 10, 2010
    Messages:
    32
    Likes Received:
    0
    Trophy Points:
    0
    She went to WSU too lol Any school but the Cougars I tell her
     
  20. Matt308

    Matt308 Glock Perfection
    Staff Member Moderator

    Joined:
    Apr 12, 2005
    Messages:
    20,140
    Likes Received:
    54
    Trophy Points:
    48
    Occupation:
    Engineer
    Location:
    Washington State
    You equate the Pacific war with burning people at the stake? Really? I know you don't Charlie, but the analogy just hit me wrong, buddy.
     
Loading...

Share This Page