"let's see...suck-up plan is working: dishes, laundry and shopping is done, just need to finish this ironing and get dinner out of the oven...now should I tell her about the new bass boat before sex tonight, or afterwards..."
"Merry Christmas, she says! Happy holidays! She gets a laptop and I'm stuck with this iron with 3 steam settings!!!! Happy Christmas this, bit......!!!!!"
Step 1....introduce her to a computer / laptop
Step 2....extol the virues of using a funny shaped mouse instead of the touchpad
step 3....say in a confident voice that the new mouse (carefull shaped to look like an iron !) was ready for her to use
Step 4....sit back and amuse himself on this forum
Backup plan....run like F*ck when she realised she'd been had !
Attention Pooh Land visitors, the freak show has escaped. Be on the lookout for four wierdos pretending they are on American Idol and singing into corn on a stick microphones.