Quotes and Jokes (4 Viewers)

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Five surgeons from big cities are discussing who makes the Best patients to operate on.


The first surgeon, from New York, says, 'I like to see accountants on my operating table
because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.'


The second, from Chicago, responds, 'Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything
inside them is color coded.'


The third surgeon, from Dallas, says, 'No, I really think librarians are the best, everything
inside them is in alphabetical order.'


The fourth surgeon, from Los Angeles chimes in: 'You know, I like construction workers...
Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over.'


But the fifth surgeon, from Washington , DC shut them all up when he observed: 'You're
all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls,
no brains, and no spine.. Plus, the head and the ass are interchangeable.'
 
I think I have seen this one if so been a while.....

Tom was in his mid 50's, retired from his 30 years in the U.S. Navy, starting a second career. However, he just couldn't seem to get to work on time. Every day 5, 10, 15 minutes late. But he was a good worker, extremely sharp, so the Boss was in a quandary about how to deal with it.

Finally, one day he called him into the office for a talk. "Tom, I have to tell you, I like your work ethic; and you do a bang-up job, but you're being late so often is really quite bothersome."

"Yes, I know Boss, and I am working on it."

"Well good, you are a team player. That's what I like to hear. It's odd though, you're coming in late so often. I know you're retired from a lifelong career with the Navy. What did they say if you came in late there?"

They always said, "Good morning, Admiral."
 

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