Quotes and Jokes

CORSNING · Jul 23, 2018

The dreaded nightmare.

Uh oh.

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fubar57 · Jul 23, 2018

vikingBerserker · Jul 23, 2018

BRILLIANT!

Gnomey · Jul 23, 2018

Greg Boeser · Jul 23, 2018

Father Flanagan waited quietly in the makeshift confessional in the base chaplain's office, as he did every morning when a big mission was scheduled. He was a serious man and saving souls in wartime was serious business. Soon he heard the office door creak open and the thud of GI boots crossed the wooden floor. A young airman knelt on the other side of the partition. "Bless me, Father, for I have sinned!" said the young man.
"Speak, child, the Lord is listening." replied the priest.
"Father, since my last confession I have been having impure thoughts." declared the penitent.
"Well, as you know," began the priest, "impurity is always grave matter, as the Lord Himself admonishes in Matthew, Chapter 5, 'whosoever shall look on a woman to lust after her hath already committed adultery with her in his heart.' However, at times the Lord permits us to be tempted, so as to test our fidelity to Him and his His commandments. Tell me, my son, when these thoughts come to you, do you entertain them?"
The kneeler creaked as the penitent nervously shifted his weight. "Well, Father, I can't rightly say if I entertain them, but they sure do entertain me!"