Catch22
Major
Ouch, that would be an unpleasant surprise.
Quotes and Jokes (3 Viewers)
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RabidAlien
1st Lieutenant
Divorce would definitely be justified!
Now that would knock you back a bit...
RabidAlien
1st Lieutenant
Heh....didn't Lucky have a date this weekend?
Depends on whether he had enough breath to blow her up
.......jeez I think I'm gonna pay for that.....
.......jeez I think I'm gonna pay for that.....
Aaron Brooks Wolters
Brigadier General
Ferdinand Foch
Staff Sergeant
Hey, here are a couple of stories that, in the words of Tough Ombre, show just how stupid the human race can be.
SORTA MAKES ONE WONDER HOW PEOPLE THINK...
Letters 'Dear Abby' admitted she was at a loss to answer:
Dear Abby: A couple of women moved across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid-twenties. These two women go everywhere together and I've never seen a man go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they could be Lebanese?
Dear Abby: What can I do about all the sex, nudity, foul language and violence on my VCR?
Dear Abby: I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much, I'm not even sure the baby I'm carrying is his.
Dear Abby: I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boy friend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.
Dear Abby: I've suspected that my husband has been fooling around, and when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again.
Dear Abby: Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?
Dear Abby: (My Favorite) I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober.
Dear Abby: My mother is mean and short tempered. I think she is going through mental pause.
Dear Abby: You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband has lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what?
SORTA MAKES ONE WONDER HOW PEOPLE THINK...
Letters 'Dear Abby' admitted she was at a loss to answer:
Dear Abby: A couple of women moved across the hall from me. One is a middle-aged gym teacher and the other is a social worker in her mid-twenties. These two women go everywhere together and I've never seen a man go into or leave their apartment. Do you think they could be Lebanese?
Dear Abby: What can I do about all the sex, nudity, foul language and violence on my VCR?
Dear Abby: I have a man I can't trust. He cheats so much, I'm not even sure the baby I'm carrying is his.
Dear Abby: I am a twenty-three year old liberated woman who has been on the pill for two years. It's getting expensive and I think my boy friend should share half the cost, but I don't know him well enough to discuss money with him.
Dear Abby: I've suspected that my husband has been fooling around, and when confronted with the evidence, he denied everything and said it would never happen again.
Dear Abby: Our son writes that he is taking Judo. Why would a boy who was raised in a good Christian home turn against his own?
Dear Abby: (My Favorite) I was married to Bill for three months and I didn't know he drank until one night he came home sober.
Dear Abby: My mother is mean and short tempered. I think she is going through mental pause.
Dear Abby: You told some woman whose husband had lost all interest in sex to send him to a doctor. Well, my husband has lost all interest in sex and he is a doctor. Now what?
RabidAlien
1st Lieutenant
Yep, definitely Lebanese! If he asks nicely, maybe he can join and make them Bicentennial!!!!
Lucky13
Forum Mascot
Last year I upgraded Boyfriend 5.0 to Man 1.0 and noticed a deterioration in performance in the Flower and Jewelry programs (which was working perfectly before with Boyfriend 5.0).
Furthermore so did Man 1.0 uninstall many useful programs such as Romance 9.9, but installed other less useful ones like Bet 5.0 and Sports News 3.0.0
Conversation 8.0 doesn't work anymore and House Cleaning 2.6 makes the whole system crash. I've tried to run Nag 5.3 to fix the problem but that doesn't help. What should I do?
From,
Desperate
Dear Desperate,
First, remember that Boyfriend 5.0 is a maintenance program, while Man 1.0 is operative one. Try to run the commando C:/I THOUGH THAT YOU LOVED ME and install Tears 6.2. Man 1.0 will then automatically run programs Guilt 3.0 and Flowers 7.0. But remember, using these too often will cause Man 1.0 to restore itself to Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 and Beer 6.1.
Beer 6.1 is a old and poor program that creates Snore_High.WAV flies. Whatever you do, do NOT install MotherInlaw 1.0 or another Boyfriend program. These programs are NOT supported and will make Man 1.0 crash.
To sum it all up, Man 1.0 is a excellent program, but it has its limitations like limited memory and takes time to leant new functions. You could consider to buy some add ons to improve the performance.
Personaly I recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Sexy Underwear 6.9.
Good luck,
Technical Support
Furthermore so did Man 1.0 uninstall many useful programs such as Romance 9.9, but installed other less useful ones like Bet 5.0 and Sports News 3.0.0
Conversation 8.0 doesn't work anymore and House Cleaning 2.6 makes the whole system crash. I've tried to run Nag 5.3 to fix the problem but that doesn't help. What should I do?
From,
Desperate
Dear Desperate,
First, remember that Boyfriend 5.0 is a maintenance program, while Man 1.0 is operative one. Try to run the commando C:/I THOUGH THAT YOU LOVED ME and install Tears 6.2. Man 1.0 will then automatically run programs Guilt 3.0 and Flowers 7.0. But remember, using these too often will cause Man 1.0 to restore itself to Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0 and Beer 6.1.
Beer 6.1 is a old and poor program that creates Snore_High.WAV flies. Whatever you do, do NOT install MotherInlaw 1.0 or another Boyfriend program. These programs are NOT supported and will make Man 1.0 crash.
To sum it all up, Man 1.0 is a excellent program, but it has its limitations like limited memory and takes time to leant new functions. You could consider to buy some add ons to improve the performance.
Personaly I recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Sexy Underwear 6.9.
Good luck,
Technical Support
Vassili Zaitzev
Master Sergeant
Ha, that one never gets old!
Lucky13
Forum Mascot
You have seen it, aye? Wasn't too sure, had to translate it from Swedish to English.....
RabidAlien
1st Lieutenant
Yeah, that one's been floating around for several years, in various incarnations of add-on software and bug-glitches. I saw one that took about two pages to read through, with some really hilarious problems/solutions (upgrade to BatteryOpToys9.1.3, this should help improve Sex.L1.Fe functions). Still...these incarnations never get old!
Yeah the Boyfriend/Wife one has been circulating for a while, doesn't mean it doesn't crack me up still.
Airframes
Benevolens Magister
I'm still chuckling!
Lucky13
Forum Mascot
Well, at least then you can't blame GM for the cr*ppy build quality! You only have yourself then.....
RabidAlien
1st Lieutenant
Very true lucky
How many parts would be left over when you're done Jan?
