Quotes and Jokes (2 Viewers)

[Wurger]

True.

 

[Lucky13]

This btw, goes for cats as well!

 

[Snautzer01]

Brits and chanting.

 

[Gnomey]

 

[Snautzer01]

Dad jokes

 

[Gnomey]

 

[DerAdlerIstGelandet]

 

[Wurger]

 

[WARSPITER]

Why do ducks have webbed feet ?
So they can stamp out bushfires.

Why do Elephants have large feet ?
So they can stamp out ducks that have caught fire.

 

[special ed]

While chasing an annoying fly around the house today in an attempt to eliminate one of God's creatures, I was reminded of the time I called a radio talk show where the guest speaker was claimed to be an expert on house flies. In my smartass model airplane aerodynamicists' knowledge, I asked, "When a fly lands on the ceiling, does it do a half loop or a half roll?"
"Well, neither actually. It approaches the ceiling in a climb and lands on it's front legs, swinging it's body inverted."
"Uh... thank you."

 

[Gnomey]

 

[special ed]

While making space on my shop door, I took these down and thought some here might want to see them:

This next clipping was given me at my job, therefore the names Steve and Rita were penciled in when I received it.
Steve was the idiot reported missing from his village and Rita's computer was the sixth he wiped clean that morning while "improving" the system.
Steve is the production supervisor who tried to convince Rita we could make more money if we billed monthly rather than quarterly.

 

[buffnut453]

Following on from the Kerch Bridge explosion, Ukraine succeeds in hitting another key symbol of Putin's power.

 

[GTX]

View attachment 690433

I know more than a few that these are probably relevant for...

 

[Airframes]

 

[Airframes]

 

[Wurger]

 

[Gnomey]

 

[Frog]

Daughters used to cook like their mothers.
They're now used to drink like their fathers.

 

[vikingBerserker]