Good ones blackwatch 
Military joke thread....feel free to post'em
- Thread starter Blackwatch
- Start date
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evangilder
"Shooter"
I like the Virgin/Slut one.
cheddar cheese
Major General
Yeah, they're all good
Yeah I dont care if they are Virgins or Sluts, I love them all!
Okay that was dumb!
Okay that was dumb!
evangilder
"Shooter"
Just remember the difference between a slut and a bitch. A slut sleeps with everyone. A bitch sleeps with everyone, but you!
Nonskimmer
Captain
But fellas...God is a sock! A freakin' sock! 
A female sock at that too.....
- Thread starter
- #32
Blackwatch
Airman 1st Class
- 107
- Sep 27, 2004
those are good ones!!!!- Thread starter
- #33
Blackwatch
Airman 1st Class
- 107
- Sep 27, 2004
LOL!
evangilder
"Shooter"
Love it!- Thread starter
- #37
Blackwatch
Airman 1st Class
- 107
- Sep 27, 2004
Famous quotes and sayings:
Churchill:
...At a prewar diplomatic conference, the Nazi Foreign Minister Ribbentrop "sniffed" to Eden and Churchill that if there was another war, the Italians would be on Germany's side!
To which Churchill supposedly replied: "that seems only fair, we had them last time!"...
Soviet:
One of the serious problems in planning the fight against American doctrine, is that the Americans do not read their manuals, nor do they feel any obligation to follow their doctrine...
- From a Soviet Junior Lt's Notebook
"The best tank terrain is that without anti-tank weapons."
-Soviet military doctrine.
American quotes from 'Unknown':
"The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step, and a lot of bitching." -Unknown
"There is no problem that cannot be solved by the use of high explosives."-Unknown
"Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn" -Unknown
"Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for" -Unknown
"The reason the American Army does so well in wartime, is that war is chaos, and the American Army practices it on a daily basis."
- from a post-war debriefing of a German General
Churchill:
...At a prewar diplomatic conference, the Nazi Foreign Minister Ribbentrop "sniffed" to Eden and Churchill that if there was another war, the Italians would be on Germany's side!
To which Churchill supposedly replied: "that seems only fair, we had them last time!"...
Soviet:
One of the serious problems in planning the fight against American doctrine, is that the Americans do not read their manuals, nor do they feel any obligation to follow their doctrine...
- From a Soviet Junior Lt's Notebook
"The best tank terrain is that without anti-tank weapons."
-Soviet military doctrine.
American quotes from 'Unknown':
"The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step, and a lot of bitching." -Unknown
"There is no problem that cannot be solved by the use of high explosives."-Unknown
"Always remember to pillage BEFORE you burn" -Unknown
"Anything worth fighting for is worth fighting dirty for" -Unknown
"The reason the American Army does so well in wartime, is that war is chaos, and the American Army practices it on a daily basis."
- from a post-war debriefing of a German General
Attachments
- Thread starter
- #38
Blackwatch
Airman 1st Class
- 107
- Sep 27, 2004
"War is God's way of teaching Americans geography." - Ambrose Bierce
"Diplomacy - the art of saying `Nice doggie' 'til you can find a stick."-Wynn Catlin
"My only fear is that the Zulu will not fight"- Lieutenant-General Lord Chelmsford, commanding British forces, just before the invasion of Zululand.
"When you men get home and face an anti-war protester, look him in the eyes and shake his hand. Then, wink at his girlfriend, because she knows she's dating a pu**y." -General Tommy Franks
"War is hell, but actual combat is a mother****er."
- Colonel Dave Hackworth's response to a reporter's attempt to interview him about a battle
"Once you have them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow"
- Lyndon B. Johnson
"My fellow Americans. I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes."-President Reagan, before a scheduled radio broadcast, unaware that the microphone was already on.
"They couldn't hit an elephant in the a** at this dist...."- Major-General John Sedgwick, 9 may 1864. Killed by a Confederate sniper during the battle of Spotsylvania.
During 2001 the IDF preformed large scale operations in the west bank.
The chief of staff at the time Major General Shaul Mofaz came to see how things are going, and was briefed by a Lt. Colonel commanding an infantry regiment. they were talking about an encounter in an alley which the Lt. Colonel described like this-
"The terrorist came out of this house to say hello. Well, hello, hello, the MG team got him!"
"Diplomacy - the art of saying `Nice doggie' 'til you can find a stick."-Wynn Catlin
"My only fear is that the Zulu will not fight"- Lieutenant-General Lord Chelmsford, commanding British forces, just before the invasion of Zululand.
"When you men get home and face an anti-war protester, look him in the eyes and shake his hand. Then, wink at his girlfriend, because she knows she's dating a pu**y." -General Tommy Franks
"War is hell, but actual combat is a mother****er."
- Colonel Dave Hackworth's response to a reporter's attempt to interview him about a battle
"Once you have them by the balls, their hearts and minds will follow"
- Lyndon B. Johnson
"My fellow Americans. I've signed legislation that will outlaw Russia forever. We begin bombing in five minutes."-President Reagan, before a scheduled radio broadcast, unaware that the microphone was already on.
"They couldn't hit an elephant in the a** at this dist...."- Major-General John Sedgwick, 9 may 1864. Killed by a Confederate sniper during the battle of Spotsylvania.
During 2001 the IDF preformed large scale operations in the west bank.
The chief of staff at the time Major General Shaul Mofaz came to see how things are going, and was briefed by a Lt. Colonel commanding an infantry regiment. they were talking about an encounter in an alley which the Lt. Colonel described like this-
"The terrorist came out of this house to say hello. Well, hello, hello, the MG team got him!"
cheddar cheese
Major General
Funny ass shit Blackwatch
LOL Blackwatch. Good ones.
