Quokes/Jotes... Continued! 2!
- Thread starter Pisis
- Start date
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102first_hussars
Tech Sergeant
Whats Green And Smells Like Pork (no not me)
A- Kermit The Frogs Finger
A- Kermit The Frogs Finger
mkloby
Senior Master Sergeant
Negative Creep
Staff Sergeant
I'm sure it's been posted before, but
mkloby
Senior Master Sergeant
what is that supposed to be?
Negative Creep
Staff Sergeant
Whoops, that didn't work, not quite sure what happened there!? 2nd attempt
http://www.snopes.com/photos/airplane/graphics/school2.jpg
Site doesn't allow hyperlinking but yes I have seen that pic before - idiot
Site doesn't allow hyperlinking but yes I have seen that pic before - idiot
Okay and the link you just posted does not do anything either...
It worked before, not sure why it has stopped working unless the picture isn't on that site anymore.
Matt308
Glock Perfection
Believe it or not this one actually happened to me a couple of months ago. Heading home in our dodge van after a long trip I get pulled over by a State Trooper. He comes back to the van and asks me if I know why he pulled me over? I said yes, I was going 62(MPH) in a 55(MPH) zone. He then asked me if I had any "priors" ( as in prior convictions for traffic violations). I replied no and my seven year old daughter sitting in the back seat says" Yes you do papa, you have a whole bunch of them at home in your tool box!" The Trooper and I looked at each other and then I started laughing and told her " Sweetie the Trooper said "priors" not "pliers" The Trooper cracked up and let me off with a warning and gave her a Junior Troopers badge.
Oh and regarding the Italian joke. I'm an equal opportunity abuser.
Matt308
Glock Perfection
trackend
Chief Master Sergeant
Im clean out of jokes so just to add something
Whats black and white and got 8 wheels?
A Nun on roller blades
Whats black and white and got 8 wheels?
A Nun on roller blades
DOUGRD
Staff Sergeant
Oh and regarding the Italian joke. I'm an equal opportunity abuser.
I'm glad Because I like a "GOOD" Italian joke as much as the next guy. Irish jokes too (I'm half Irish) And let me be telling you,Nobody got in more fights on St. Paddys Day than me. Well there I was standing on the corner with all the other lads and lasses waiting for the school bus to take me to dear old Cardinal O'hara high school when out of nowhere somebody yells "Whats that Wop doing wearing a shamrock on his jacket? Does he think he can get away with insulting the green like that?" By the time I got to school I was green and black and blue. Happened every year I was in high school. Luckily I never had to repeat a year!! By the way, Does anybody here know what "WOP" stands for ? HINT: It's really an acronym.
Matt308
Glock Perfection
Not being Italian, I had no idea and looked it up.
"Contrary to what some may think or have read, "Wop" isn't an acronym for "With Out Papers", but was derived from an Italian word "guappo", which means thug."
Is that true?
"Contrary to what some may think or have read, "Wop" isn't an acronym for "With Out Papers", but was derived from an Italian word "guappo", which means thug."
Is that true?
twoeagles
Senior Airman
The husband had just finished reading a new book entitled, "You Can Be The Man Of Your House." He stormed to his wife in the kitchen and announced, "From now on, you need to know that I am the man of this house and my word is Law. You will prepare me a gourmet meal tonight, and when I'm finished eating my meal, you will serve me a sinful dessert. After dinner, you are going to go upstairs with me and we will have the kind of sex that I want. Afterwards, you are going to draw me a bath so I can relax. You will wash my back and towel me dry and bring me my robe. Then, you will massage my feet and hands. Then tomorrow, guess who's going to dress me and comb my hair?
The wife replied, "The fu**ing funeral director would be my first guess."
The wife replied, "The fu**ing funeral director would be my first guess."
Joe2
Banned
Why did Hitler kill himslef?
He saw his gas bill!!!
He saw his gas bill!!!
Ajax
Airman 1st Class
Why did Hitler kill himself?
He realised his big mistake; trusting the Italians.
He realised his big mistake; trusting the Italians.
Matt308
Glock Perfection
> I thought you would enjoy this one.
If Everyone is in a hurry to scream "racism" these days!
>
> A man asks: "In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?"
>
> The clerk looks at him and says, "Are you Polish?"
>
> The guy (clearly offended) says, "Well, yes I am. But let me ask you
> something.
>
> If I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian?
>
> Or if I had asked for German bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?
>
> Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?
>
> Or if I had asked for a Taco would you ask if I was Mexican? Would you?
>
> Would you?"
>
> The clerk says, "Well, no!"
>
> "If I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?"
>
> "Well, I probably wouldn't!"
>
> With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says, "Well then, why did
> you
> ask me if I'm Polish just because I asked for Polish sausage?"
>
> The clerk replies, "Because you're at Home Depot."
If Everyone is in a hurry to scream "racism" these days!
>
> A man asks: "In what aisle could I find the Polish sausage?"
>
> The clerk looks at him and says, "Are you Polish?"
>
> The guy (clearly offended) says, "Well, yes I am. But let me ask you
> something.
>
> If I had asked for Italian sausage would you ask me if I was Italian?
>
> Or if I had asked for German bratwurst, would you ask me if I was German?
>
> Or if I asked for a kosher hot dog would you ask me if I was Jewish?
>
> Or if I had asked for a Taco would you ask if I was Mexican? Would you?
>
> Would you?"
>
> The clerk says, "Well, no!"
>
> "If I asked for some Irish whiskey, would you ask if I was Irish?"
>
> "Well, I probably wouldn't!"
>
> With deep self-righteous indignation, the guy says, "Well then, why did
> you
> ask me if I'm Polish just because I asked for Polish sausage?"
>
> The clerk replies, "Because you're at Home Depot."
DOUGRD
Staff Sergeant
The one I read said it originally came from the Spanish "GUAPO" which meant "Pretty Boy". (I like that one better than the thug definition8) ) Supposedly way back when Spain brought in a lot of Italians to augment the workforce the Spanish men got ticked off because the Italians were picking up all the chics and the Spaniards referred to the Italians as Guapo's. (Now I'll let you in on a secret Matt308, I had to look it up on Google too)
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