Quotes and Jokes (1 Viewer)

[special ed]

 

[Greg Boeser]

View attachment 726240

And the bills for your crushing student loan debt will start arriving in six months.
But I'm super proud of your batchelor's degree in feminist interpretive dance.

 

[Snautzer01]

 

[MIflyer]

And the bills for your crushing student loan debt will start arriving in six months.
But I'm super proud of your batchelor's degree in feminist interpretive dance.

There is a video on YouTube where an infuriated young lady a couple of years out of college says, "Work at this job in this office eight hours a day, five days a week, for thirty years? No way! I'm not doing it!"

And there is another one where a girl getting dressed to go to college says, "You women in the sixties really screwed up my life! Got to go to college so you can get a job! I'd have been happy to stay home and do the cooking and the cleaning and the washing!"

 

[GrauGeist]

 

[Wurger]

 

[Greg Boeser]

There is a video on YouTube where an infuriated young lady a couple of years out of college says, "Work at this job in this office eight hours a day, five days a week, for thirty years? No way! I'm not doing it!"

And there is another one where a girl getting dressed to go to college says, "You women in the sixties really screwed up my life! Got to go to college so you can get a job! I'd have been happy to stay home and do the cooking and the cleaning and the washing!"

If we could learn to be content with less, women could stay home.
But from experience, I'm not sure women could ever be happy.

 

[MIflyer]

If we could learn to be content with less, women could stay home.

"We" does not necessarily mean us Men. Have you noticed how many places there are that do women's nails? Used to be the only place that did nails was at beauty parlors, maybe a few barber shops. A place that did nails would have been like a place that sold nothing but paper clips.

Last year I was going to my 52nd HS reunion and needed a haircut. I was at my brother's house and did not know any barbers in the area. There were a lot more places around for nothing but nails than there were barbers. Then I started noticing them; they are all over the place.

 

[Gnomey]

 

[special ed]

 

[special ed]

 

[special ed]

 

[Elvis]

View attachment 726374

I used to drive past that Toe Truck every day.
Lincoln Towing moved years ago and that truck is now on display at MOHAI (museum of history and industry), I believe.

 

[Snautzer01]

 

[special ed]

Why no one believes seniors:

An elderly couple was celebrating their 60th anniversary. They had married as childhood sweethearts and had moved back to their old neighborhood after retirement.
Holding hands, they walked back to their old school. Finding it not locked, they entered, found the old desk they shared, where Andy had carved, "I love you, Sally."
Walking home, a money bag fell from an armored car, at their feet. Sally quickly picked it up, and with the truck driving on, they took it home, not sure what to do.
Sally counted the money and exclaimed, "Fifty thousand dollars!"
"We have to give it back!", said Andy.
"Finders keepers." Sally put the bag of money in the closet.
The next day, two policemen canvassing the neighborhood came to the door.
"Did either of you see or find a bag that fell from an armored car yesterday?"
Sally said, "No."
Andy said, "She's lying. She hid it in the closet."
"Don't believe him. He's is getting senile."
A policeman turned to Andy and said, "Tell us the story from the beginning."
"Well, when Sally and I were walking home from school yesterday......"
The other policeman turned to his partner and said, "We're outta here!"

 

[special ed]

A woman in a supermarket is following a grandfather and his badly behaving grandson.
The child is screaming for candy, cookies and other things.
The grandfather is saying in a controlled voice, "Easy Duncan, we won't be long."
After another outburst, she hears the grandfather calmly, "It's okay Duncan. Just a couple more minutes and we'll be out of here. Hang in there."
At checkout the little horror is throwing items from the cart. Grandfather again in a controlled voice, "Duncan, relax buddy, don't get upset. We'll be home in five minutes. Stay cool Duncan."
Impressed, the woman goes outside where the grandfather is loading groceries and the boy into the car.
"It's none of my business, but you were amazing in there. I don't know how you did it. The whole time, you kept your composure and no matter how loud he got, you just calmly kept saying that things would be okay. Duncan is very lucky to have you as his grandfather."
"Thanks, but I'm Duncan, this little shit's name is Kevin."

 

[Gnomey]

 

[Njaco]

 

[Lucky13]

 

[Snautzer01]