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A customer in a Florida supermarket tries to buy half a head of lettuce.
The very young produce assistant tells him that they sell only whole heads of lettuce. The man persists and asks to see the manager. The boy says he'll ask his manager about it.
Walking into the back room, the boy says to his manager, "Some a$$hole out there wants to buy half a head of lettuce..."
As he finishes his sentence, he turns to find the customer standing right behind him, so he adds, "...and this gentleman has kindly offered to buy the other half."
The manager approves the deal, and the man went on his way.
Later the manager says to the boy, "I was impressed with the way you got yourself out of that situation earlier, we like people who think on their feet here; where are you from, son?"
"Canada, sir," the boy replies.
"Well, why did you leave Canada?" the manager asks.
The boy says, "Sir, there's nothing but whores and hockey players up there."
"Really?" replies the manager. "My wife is from Canada."
"No $h!t?" replies the boy "Who'd she play for?"