Quotes and Jokes (3 Viewers)

[Gnomey]

 

[special ed]

A couple was Christmas shopping at the mall on Christmas Eve and the mall was packed. As the wife walked through the mall, she was surprised to look around and not see her husband any where. She was quite upset because they had a lot to do. Because she was worried, she called him to ask where he was. In a calm voice, her husband said, "Honey, you remember the jewelry store we went into about five years ago where you fell in love with that diamond necklace that we could not afford and I told you I would get it for you one day?" The wife choked up and started to cry and said, "yes, I remember that store." "Well, I'm in the bar right next to it."

 

[Wurger]

 

[Gnomey]

 

[michaelmaltby]

 

[Gnomey]

 

[special ed]

A woman found that her dog (a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she took him to a veterinarian. The vet found the problem was hair in the dog's ears, so he cleaned both ears and the dog could then hear fine. The vet then told her if she wanted to keep this from recurring, she should buy some "Nair" hair remover and rub it in the dog's ears once a month. At the drug store she bought "Nair" and at the register, the pharmacist told her, "If you're going to use this under your arms, don't use deodorant for a few days." She said, "I'm not using it under my arms." The Pharmacist replied, "If you are using it on your legs, don't use body lotion for a couple of days." She said, "I'm not using it on my legs either. If you must know, I'm using it on my Schnauzer." "Well, stay off your bicycle for about a week."

 

[Snautzer01]

A woman found that her dog (a Schnauzer) could hardly hear, so she took him to a veterinarian. The vet found the problem was hair in the dog's ears, so he cleaned both ears and the dog could then hear fine. The vet then told her if she wanted to keep this from recurring, she should buy some "Nair" hair remover and rub it in the dog's ears once a month. At the drug store she bought "Nair" and at the register, the pharmacist told her, "If you're going to use this under your arms, don't use deodorant for a few days." She said, "I'm not using it under my arms." The Pharmacist replied, "If you are using it on your legs, don't use body lotion for a couple of days." She said, "I'm not using it on my legs either. If you must know, I'm using it on my Schnauzer." "Well, stay off your bicycle for about a week."

What ??

 

[special ed]

I thought that might pull your chain.

 

[Gnomey]

 

[ARTESH]

Mr. Difficulty

آپارات - سرویس اشتراک ویدیو

www.aparat.com

Do you have any difficulties?

 

[Lucky13]

 

[Wurger]

 

[Gnomey]

 

[Greg Boeser]

Hey! No politics!!!

 

[ARTESH]

Hey! No politics!!!

No politics, just a leak about new coming trilogy for fans!!!

 

[Greg Boeser]

OOOOOO!!! Sign me up!

 

[Maxrobot1]

Ok everyone! Stand back!

 

[Maxrobot1]

Chomp!

 

[Gnomey]