Quotes and Jokes (3 Viewers)

[MiTasol]

These comments are so true. The woman is a Kiwi comedian from Whangamata and usually seen in "Mike and Joelle" on youtube.


View: https://www.youtube.com/shorts/enxkp_evZnI

 

[Gnomey]

 

[A4K]

Love it

 

[Lucky13]

Rich Hall, "....in America I'm an alcoholic, in Britain, I have just have a "problem", in Ireland I'm a lightweight!"

 

[Wurger]

 

[special ed]

A vulture carrying two dead raccoons boards an airplane.
The stewardess says, "I'm sorry sir, only one carrion allowed per passenger."

 

[CATCH 22]

If you remember those times, you are really very old:

I do remember a modernized version of the above apparatus with a cassette recorder, but I'm a bit younger....
And there was no plywood base anymore....

 

[Gnomey]

 

[Frog]

RATING :

• His men would follow him anywhere, but only out of curiosity.
• I would not breed from this Officer.
• This Officer is really not so much of a has-been, but more of a definitely won't-be.
• When she opens her mouth, it seems that this is only to change whichever foot was previously in there.
• He has carried out each and every one of his duties to his entire satisfaction.
• He would be out of his depth in a car park puddle.
• Technically sound, but socially impossible.
• This Officer reminds me very much of a gyroscope - always spinning around at a frantic pace, but not really going anywhere.
• This young lady has delusions of adequacy.
• When he joined my ship, this Officer was something of a granny; since then he has aged considerably.
• This Medical Officer has used my ship to carry his genitals from port to port, and my officers to carry him from bar to bar.
• Since my last report he has reached rock bottom, and has started to dig.
• She sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to achieve them.
• He has the wisdom of youth, and the energy of old age.
• This Officer should go far - and the sooner he starts, the better.
• In my opinion this pilot should not be authorized to fly below 250 feet.
• This man is depriving a village somewhere of an idiot.
• The only ship I would recommend this man for is citizenship.
• Works well when under constant supervision and cornered like a rat in a trap.

 

[Wurger]

 

[Gnomey]

 

[Snautzer01]

 

[MiTasol]

Twisted. I like it.

 

[MIflyer]

The one I liked the most is:

"This officer's most salient characteristic is his scrupulous honesty. I have counseled him on this character defect."

 

[MIflyer]

 

[MIflyer]

If you remember those times, you are really very old:

I recall my brother having a model kit of a station wagon. One of the options you could use was a wood deck that had record turntable built into it. Now, that is being serious about your mobile music capabilities.

 

[special ed]

Two hydrogen atoms meet. One says, "I've lost my electron."
The other says, "Are you sure?"
"Yes, I'm positive."

 

[MiTasol]

 

[Wurger]

 

[Snautzer01]