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Dear Santa,

I need to clear up a thing or two regarding Fowl Turkey Bacon. Readie seems to be under the impression I have been, not in My lifetime, tempted by this Misinterpretation of bacon, made from what should be baked for Christmas dinner, turkey. I also have no confusion regarding Buffalo, or Bison. I made special trips to Tommy's Joint in San Francisco for my Buffalo Stew fix!

I hope I have made this clear to Santa, and that my stocking will be truly full of Christmas goodies this coming December 25th. A 48th scale P-47N, with some accessories would be nice. No need to leave Readie with a stocking full of coal, he does mean well.

Bill
 
Dear Santa,

I won't ask for the ability to understand women as it's probably way beyond your powers to begin with.

I ask for only 2 things.

1 - Please teach our UK friends the proper way of spelling words, and to stop putting in all those extra u's and e's in everything. They use so many that our poor Slavic friends have to use almost nothing but consonants (since our UK friends keep hoarding all the vowels).

2 - A hanger full of authentic WW2 aircraft, I'll leave the choices up to you as long as they include a B-10, Fw 190, Fw 189, P-47, Ju-87, He 177 and a B-32.

Your friend
David
 
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Dear Santa,

1) While I would love a stocking full of English coal from Bill I'm afraid you will have to work hard to reopen the mines that a certain Baroness shut.
2) Mister Meatloaf and I would love a trip to watch a England V Germany football match so he can see first hand the delight we take in taking the piss out of the Germans. In return I am happy to accompany him to Berlin for a look see. No jokes, no funny walks or inappropriate remarks promised.
View: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tGqJN1kAWwU The only stipulation is that we don't have to listen to that awfull racket Kraftwerk...
3) Mr V Bersker really would love a Spitfire in his hanger. Do you have a spare one hanging around? failing that a Merlin would be nice for him so he can run it up and hear what a proper aero engine sounds like
4) I'm semi convinced that no real American would touch turkey bacon... however our esteemed moderator in New Jersey still has to confess. Perhaps you could pop a packet of top quality British bacon in his stocking so he knows what he is missing.
5) I know its a tall order but, our American friends spelling really is appalling. Can you put a English dictionary in each stocking PLEASE...

Thanks awfully old bean

John
 
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Getting back to the banner - I think it should remain. The reason? Well, today, it's been rather like December here, with rain and sleet, and I saw a big guy, with a long white beard, wearing a red coat, asking directions to the Reindeer feed store, and he also asked if Argos have any good deals, as his warehouse is low on stock, with Christmas coming so early this year. I also overheard him, as I passed a local printing works, asking how much to print 100 million copies of "English for Americans made easy" .........
 
Njaco said:
and they're not so far apart!
Click to expand...

Not necessarily Chris ...the 'summer' in the UK for the last 4 years has been ****. We brought a big gas BBQ hoping for family do's on a weekend...its hardly seen the light of day.

When I lived in Melbourne I can remember the four seasons in one day that Bayside is notorious for. At least the sea was warmer though !!
 
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Ha, Ha, Ha!!! NO, It is my doing!
It is all according to my process of world domination.
If you would like to see better weather, send me money!
Ha,HA,Ha.!!!!
And then I might think about it.
 
How to identify the British seasons:-
1. If the rain is going horizontal, and is extremely cold, it's Winter.
2. If the rain is going diagonal, and very cold, it's Autumn (that's 'Fall' for those across the Pond!).
3. If the rain is going diagonal, or horizontal, but slightly warmer, it's Spring.
4. If it's just raining, whether vertical, horizontal, or diagonal, either warmer or cold, but Ice Cream vans can be seen, it's Summer.
 

Summer? let me try and remember what the sun feels like...
 
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