Old Wizard
2nd Lieutenant
Quotes and Jokes (4 Viewers)
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Crimea_River
Marshal
A SHORT, BUT BEAUTIFUL LOVE STORY
A man and a woman who had never met
before, but who were both married to
other people, found themselves assigned
to the same sleeping room on a
transcontinental train.
Though initially embarrassed and uneasy
over sharing a room, they were both very
tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the
upper berth and she in the lower.
At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and
gently woke the woman saying, 'Ma'am,
I'm sorry to bother you, but would you
be willing to reach into the closet to get
me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold.'
'I have a better idea,' she replied, 'Just for
tonight, let's pretend that we're married'.
'Wow! That's a great idea!' he exclaimed.
'Good,' she replied, 'Get your own f!cking blanket!'
After a moment of silence, he farted
The End.
A man and a woman who had never met
before, but who were both married to
other people, found themselves assigned
to the same sleeping room on a
transcontinental train.
Though initially embarrassed and uneasy
over sharing a room, they were both very
tired and fell asleep quickly, he in the
upper berth and she in the lower.
At 1:00 AM, the man leaned down and
gently woke the woman saying, 'Ma'am,
I'm sorry to bother you, but would you
be willing to reach into the closet to get
me a second blanket? I'm awfully cold.'
'I have a better idea,' she replied, 'Just for
tonight, let's pretend that we're married'.
'Wow! That's a great idea!' he exclaimed.
'Good,' she replied, 'Get your own f!cking blanket!'
After a moment of silence, he farted
The End.
Robert Porter
Senior Master Sergeant
Crimea_River
Marshal
Old Wizard
2nd Lieutenant
Lucky13
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Lucky13
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Old Wizard
2nd Lieutenant
Airframes
Benevolens Magister
It belongs to a neighhh bor ........................... I've got me coat !
Lucky13
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Lucky13
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The Highways Agency found over two hundred dead crows on the M4 near Slough recently, and there was immediate concern that they may have died from Avian Flu.
A Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be from vehicular impacts.
However, during analysis it was noted that varying colours of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analysing these paint residues it was found that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with lorries, while only 2% were killed by cars.
The Agency then hired an Ornithological Behaviourist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills. The Ornithological Behaviourist quickly concluded that when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow to warn of danger.
They discovered that whilst all the lookout crows could shout "Cah!" – not a single one could shout "Lorry!"
A Pathologist examined the remains of all the crows, and, to everyone's relief, confirmed the problem was NOT Avian Flu. The cause of death appeared to be from vehicular impacts.
However, during analysis it was noted that varying colours of paints appeared on the bird's beaks and claws. By analysing these paint residues it was found that 98% of the crows had been killed by impact with lorries, while only 2% were killed by cars.
The Agency then hired an Ornithological Behaviourist to determine if there was a cause for the disproportionate percentages of truck kills versus car kills. The Ornithological Behaviourist quickly concluded that when crows eat road kill, they always have a look-out crow to warn of danger.
They discovered that whilst all the lookout crows could shout "Cah!" – not a single one could shout "Lorry!"
