I think my neighbor is stalking me as she's been googling my name on her computer. I saw it through my telescope last night.
Quotes and Jokes (3 Viewers)
- Thread starter v2
- Start date
Ad: This forum contains affiliate links to products on Amazon and eBay. More information in Terms and rules
FRIEND: it is so called the male person in possession of that "certain something" that erases any ambition to go to bed with him.
FRIEND: it is so called the female person in possession of that "certain something" that makes you a crazy desire to go to bed with her.
FRIEND: it is so called the female person in possession of that "certain something" that makes you a crazy desire to go to bed with her.
Today I woke up very early, I dress slowly, prepared coffee, took my golf clubs and I went to the garage. I put my clubs in the car and I pulled the car out of the garage under a torrential rain.
The road was completely flooded and the cold wind was blowing at 100 kph.
I came back with the car, turned on the radio and heard that the forecast said that the weather would last all day.
What a disappointment!
I came back home and quietly slipped into bed again.
I approached my wife and putting a hand on her buttock, I whispered:
"The weather outside is horrible"
She sleepily answered:
"Yes I know. That dumbass of my husband just went to play golf with this weather!"
The road was completely flooded and the cold wind was blowing at 100 kph.
I came back with the car, turned on the radio and heard that the forecast said that the weather would last all day.
What a disappointment!
I came back home and quietly slipped into bed again.
I approached my wife and putting a hand on her buttock, I whispered:
"The weather outside is horrible"
She sleepily answered:
"Yes I know. That dumbass of my husband just went to play golf with this weather!"
Last edited:
Lucky13
Forum Mascot
Bacon!!
Crimea_River
Marshal
He he.
vikingBerserker
Lieutenant General
The fight we had last night was my fault,
my wife asked me what was on the TV and i said dust.
my wife asked me what was on the TV and i said dust.
My Mommy The Dancer..., a real tear jerking story…
One day a fourth-grade teacher asked the children what their mothers did
for a living.
All the typical answers came up -- teacher, nurse, businesswoman,
saleswoman, doctor, lawyer, and so forth.
However, little Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the
teacher prodded him about his mother, he replied, "Well my mother's an
exotic dancer in a cabaret and takes off all her clothes in front of men
and they put money in her underwear. Sometimes, if the offer is really
good, she will go home with some guy and stay with him all night for money."
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other
children to work on some exercises and then took little Johnny aside to ask
him, "Is that really true about your mother?"
No," the boy said, "She works for the Democratic National Committee and is
helping to get Hillary Clinton to be our next President, but I was too
embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids."
One day a fourth-grade teacher asked the children what their mothers did
for a living.
All the typical answers came up -- teacher, nurse, businesswoman,
saleswoman, doctor, lawyer, and so forth.
However, little Johnny was being uncharacteristically quiet, so when the
teacher prodded him about his mother, he replied, "Well my mother's an
exotic dancer in a cabaret and takes off all her clothes in front of men
and they put money in her underwear. Sometimes, if the offer is really
good, she will go home with some guy and stay with him all night for money."
The teacher, obviously shaken by this statement, hurriedly set the other
children to work on some exercises and then took little Johnny aside to ask
him, "Is that really true about your mother?"
No," the boy said, "She works for the Democratic National Committee and is
helping to get Hillary Clinton to be our next President, but I was too
embarrassed to say that in front of the other kids."
vikingBerserker
Lieutenant General
LMAO!
