Quotes and Jokes

• May 24, 2019

• #11,721

Wurger

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• May 24, 2019

• #11,722

buffnut453

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Airframes said:

Man goes to the Doctor, and said "Please help me, I'm convinced I'm a piglet."
"Oh," replied the Doctor, "and why's that ?"
"Well, I keep rolling around in the mud, and sniff at the ground all the time, looking for food."
"Hmm, I see. " The Doctor replied. "And how long have you felt like this ?"
"Oh, about a weeeeeek !".

Click to expand...

And that one's going into my data bank for "Bad Joke Wednesday" at work!!!

 

• May 24, 2019

• #11,723

vikingBerserker

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Dangit, I RALLY tried not to laugh at that one!

 

• May 24, 2019

• #11,724

Crimea_River

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• May 24, 2019

• #11,725

Wurger

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• May 24, 2019

• #11,726

Gnomey

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• May 24, 2019

• #11,727

S

special ed

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My youngest son in law calls these "Dad jokes". He still laughs.

 

• May 24, 2019

• #11,728

A4K

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Dec 17, 2007

The back of beyond

-Hey mum, why are we pushing the caravan off a cliff?
- SHHHHH! You'll wake your father up!

(old kiwi school joke )

 

• May 24, 2019

• #11,729

Wurger

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• May 27, 2019

• #11,730

Wayne Little

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• May 27, 2019

• #11,731

buffnut453

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Jul 25, 2007

Cambridgeshire, England

Excuse me, but does this bus stop at the pier head?

There'll be a bluddy big splash if it doesn't!


Sorry...old Liverpool joke from my youth.

 

• May 27, 2019

• #11,732

Airframes

Benevolens Magister

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Aug 24, 2008

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What do you call an ape in a minefield ?
A BaBOOM !

I've got me coat .........................

 

• May 27, 2019

• #11,733

Wurger

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• May 27, 2019

• #11,734

Gnomey

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• May 27, 2019

• #11,735

Crimea_River

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.........and STAY out!!!!!!!

 

• May 27, 2019

• #11,736

Greg Boeser

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Jul 29, 2016

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buffnut453 said:

Excuse me, but does this bus stop at the pier head?

There'll be a bluddy big splash if it doesn't!


Sorry...old Liverpool joke from my youth.

Click to expand...

Reminds me of one a friend told me.
He had been walking on a country road when a toff in a fancy sports car pulled up along side and said:
"My man, does this road go to the coast?"
He replied, "Oh no, sir! This here road don't go anywhere. It's always just sorta laid here."

 

• May 27, 2019

• #11,737

Wurger

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• May 28, 2019

• #11,738

Wayne Little

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• May 28, 2019

• #11,739

fubar57

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Nov 22, 2009

The Jungles of Canada

 

• May 28, 2019

• #11,740

buffnut453

Captain

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Jul 25, 2007

Cambridgeshire, England

Airframes said:

What do you call an ape in a minefield ?
A BaBOOM !

I've got me coat .........................

Click to expand...

And that's another one for Bad Joke Wednesday. Perfect timing Terry. For some reason, that one really amused me. Thanks for sharing!