So, there I was...
First off, I'm old so this story is from quite a few years ago. Back when the Shah was in power and everything was hunky-dory between Iran and the land of the big BX, I was a crew chief on a KC-135A. We were dragging some new F-14's across to Iran. They were all done up in Iranian camo of grays and blues and tans and looked beautiful. It was a long and boring trip. At some point the Boom gets my attention pointing to his phones. I get on the comm and hear some chatter between our AC and the lead F-14. They're going to put on a show to break their boredom and get some blood spread around a bit. So they go through some aerial escapades and we watch. Then they form back up and rotate behind us to get a little more push water. After the refuel is done my AC calls them and suggests they put a little space between themselves and us because he's gonna put on a show too. I'm thinking "what the ...?" They spread out and my AC calls to them saying "Okay, watch this" We don't budge a inch but continue on course. The F-14 skipper calls over after a few minutes asking what he should be looking for. Our AC apologizes and says "Oh, sorry, I had to get up first to take a leak, jog around the cargo compartment to stretch a bit and get a cup of coffee. I can't spill the coffee now, can I?"
Okay, it's not a side-splitter but at the time we knew those drivers were getting pretty antsy shifting from cheek to cheek.
One of my jobs while airborne was to bring porn rags and be ready when we started refueling. Usually the right or back seater of the receiver would do the same. It was kind of traditional. Then while we're locked on and dragging them we'd take turns showing each other the various centerfold spreads. If the receiver was a single place we'd just entertain him compliments of our AC. He'd usually signal us to turn the page. We were very close to the cockpits of the F-4s because their receivers were aft of the canopy along the spine. Those were the best shows.
Last, I blew over a Chevy step-van while in Zaragosa, Spain. I was running all 4 with water injection while doing an engine trim and throttle alignment and he just casually drove right behind the plane. I don't know if anyone knows it but a j57-59w engine burning water puts out a pretty good exhaust plume of black smoke so the dude had to see it. He said he did but thought he could just drive right through it no prob. Noob. The look on his face is as crisp in my memory now as it was the moment he crawled out of that truck. Priceless.
First off, I'm old so this story is from quite a few years ago. Back when the Shah was in power and everything was hunky-dory between Iran and the land of the big BX, I was a crew chief on a KC-135A. We were dragging some new F-14's across to Iran. They were all done up in Iranian camo of grays and blues and tans and looked beautiful. It was a long and boring trip. At some point the Boom gets my attention pointing to his phones. I get on the comm and hear some chatter between our AC and the lead F-14. They're going to put on a show to break their boredom and get some blood spread around a bit. So they go through some aerial escapades and we watch. Then they form back up and rotate behind us to get a little more push water. After the refuel is done my AC calls them and suggests they put a little space between themselves and us because he's gonna put on a show too. I'm thinking "what the ...?" They spread out and my AC calls to them saying "Okay, watch this" We don't budge a inch but continue on course. The F-14 skipper calls over after a few minutes asking what he should be looking for. Our AC apologizes and says "Oh, sorry, I had to get up first to take a leak, jog around the cargo compartment to stretch a bit and get a cup of coffee. I can't spill the coffee now, can I?"
Okay, it's not a side-splitter but at the time we knew those drivers were getting pretty antsy shifting from cheek to cheek.
One of my jobs while airborne was to bring porn rags and be ready when we started refueling. Usually the right or back seater of the receiver would do the same. It was kind of traditional. Then while we're locked on and dragging them we'd take turns showing each other the various centerfold spreads. If the receiver was a single place we'd just entertain him compliments of our AC. He'd usually signal us to turn the page. We were very close to the cockpits of the F-4s because their receivers were aft of the canopy along the spine. Those were the best shows.
Last, I blew over a Chevy step-van while in Zaragosa, Spain. I was running all 4 with water injection while doing an engine trim and throttle alignment and he just casually drove right behind the plane. I don't know if anyone knows it but a j57-59w engine burning water puts out a pretty good exhaust plume of black smoke so the dude had to see it. He said he did but thought he could just drive right through it no prob. Noob. The look on his face is as crisp in my memory now as it was the moment he crawled out of that truck. Priceless.
