wheelsup_cavu
1st Sergeant
Wheels
Quotes and Jokes
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Wheels
RabidAlien
1st Lieutenant
Bloody frikkin BRILLIANT!!! 
The light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off....? 
BikerBabe
Senior Master Sergeant
RabidAlien
1st Lieutenant
Yeah, that crackling sound, accompanied by the smell of burning electronics? That's just Lucky drooling on his keyboard again. Lucky, my friend....ya gotta scroll down far enough to read the caption!!!
BikerBabe
Senior Master Sergeant
Someone stole all my credit cards but I won't be reporting it.....
The thief spends less than my wife does......
The thief spends less than my wife does......
vikingBerserker
Lieutenant General
-------------------------------
"As a new paratrooper, I was struck by all the T-shirts on
base emblazoned with the motto "Death from above!" Later I
noticed a submariner with a T-shirt that declared "Death
from below!"
Then, standing in line for chow one day, I was served by an
Army cook. His T-shirt had a skull with a crossed fork and
spoon underneath and yet another warning: "Death from within!"
T Bolt
Colonel
Aaron Brooks Wolters
Brigadier General
RabidAlien
1st Lieutenant
ToughOmbre
Senior Master Sergeant
A man was riding his Harley along a California beach when suddenly the clouds parted above his head. In a booming voice, the Lord said.....
"Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish."
The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic, think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind."
The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, "Lord, I wish that I, and all men, could understand our wives; what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong."
The Lord replied, "You want two lanes, or four, on that bridge?"
TO
"Because you have TRIED to be faithful to me in all ways, I will grant you one wish."
The biker pulled over and said, "Build a bridge to Hawaii so I can ride over anytime I want."
The Lord said, "Your request is materialistic, think of the enormous challenges for that kind of undertaking; the supports required to reach the bottom of the Pacific and the concrete and steel it would take! It will nearly exhaust several natural resources. I can do it, but it is hard for me to justify your desire for worldly things. Take a little more time and think of something that could possibly help mankind."
The biker thought about it for a long time. Finally, he said, "Lord, I wish that I, and all men, could understand our wives; what she's thinking when she gives me the silent treatment, why she cries, what she means when she says nothing's wrong."
The Lord replied, "You want two lanes, or four, on that bridge?"
TO
T Bolt
Colonel
ToughOmbre
Senior Master Sergeant
Two Middle East mothers are sitting in a cafe chatting over a plate of tabouli and a pint of goat's milk. The older of the two pulls a bag out of her purse and starts flipping through photos. They start reminiscing.
"This is my oldest son, Mujibar. He would have been 24 years old now."
"Yes, I remember him as a baby," says the other mother cheerfully.
"He's a martyr now though," the mother confides.
"Oh, so sad dear," says the other.
"And this is my second son, Khalid. He would have been 21."
"Oh, I remember him," says the other happily, "He had such curly hair when he was born."
"He's a martyr too," says the mother quietly.
"Oh, gracious me .. . . , " says the other.
"And this is my third son, my baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He would have been 18," she whispers.
"Yes," says the friend enthusiastically, "I remember when he first started school."
"He's a martyr also," says the mother, with tears in her eyes.
After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks wistfully at the photographs and, searching for the right words, says.....
"They blow up so fast, don't they?"
TO
"This is my oldest son, Mujibar. He would have been 24 years old now."
"Yes, I remember him as a baby," says the other mother cheerfully.
"He's a martyr now though," the mother confides.
"Oh, so sad dear," says the other.
"And this is my second son, Khalid. He would have been 21."
"Oh, I remember him," says the other happily, "He had such curly hair when he was born."
"He's a martyr too," says the mother quietly.
"Oh, gracious me .. . . , " says the other.
"And this is my third son, my baby. My beautiful Ahmed. He would have been 18," she whispers.
"Yes," says the friend enthusiastically, "I remember when he first started school."
"He's a martyr also," says the mother, with tears in her eyes.
After a pause and a deep sigh, the second Muslim mother looks wistfully at the photographs and, searching for the right words, says.....
"They blow up so fast, don't they?"
TO
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